How would you approach this?

I have two childhood friends I've been close to for years. They were bridesmaids at my wedding and I was at theirs. We talk most weeks. Both of them can't drive though, they have licenses but both anxious drivers and prefer not to. Long story short I moved away about 10 years ago so we don't see eachother much. I have always visited for important occasions though and driven the 3 hour journey. I had a baby last year and neither of them have met her. They keep inviting me to bring my little girl to them. I feel a bit annoyed about this and feel they should make the effort to travel, if they wanted to meet her they would. She is turning one and has her party next week. Both have contacted me today to say they can't attend but have invited me to a Christmas get together - you guessed it, down near them. Should I voice that I'm not happy with them and face potentially losing them. At this point I feel like I've lost them anyway. Or should I not make it awkward and just leave it. I don't like pretending we're all happy with eachother anymore because I'm not.

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Voice it … I’d try my absolute hardest to visit my best friend even if she didn’t just have a baby

Voice it. If they get mad, those are emotions they have to deal with. They're not being fair to you and you're over extending yourself to keep the friendship.

Hardly any of my friends came to see my last baby because I'd moved 20 miles away, whereas the other 2 everyone came. It sucks. I hardly see any of them anymore. There's no hard feelings but like you say, if people want to, they will. If you feel you've lost them already then you have nothing to lose by sharing how you feel 💗

As the friend who is the anxious driver- silly reason to lose a friendship. My anxiety is crippling and could cause an accident where people are seriously injured or killed. Its not safe. I only drive within a five mile radius around my house. Familiar streets. Anything further I uber. Think how you would feel if they traveled to see you and drove dangerously and got into an accident. People have limitations. Accept them or move on.

I think I would have to tell them I'm disappointed that they haven't come to meet my daughter, especially after the direct invite for her birthday. No, they can't drive, but they could get public transport (I assume anyway, you don't say where you are)

Tbh if you are that close friends, the friendship will last, even if you don't see each other for a year or so. When bub is old enough that you want to make the drive, go see them. I'd recommend you stay there at least 2 days. You drive down in a nap time, stay a few days, drive back in a nap time.

Babe yes omg wtf that is bullshit

Voice it. I learned the hard way that letting resentment build under the surface to avoid drama rather than just being honest- it makes things so much worse.

Voice it. As a friend I feel like they should do better. I’ve been friends with my BFF for over 20 years. When I first moved 6 hours away she came to visit me, and it was snowing so it took her longing to come up. I’ve been here 5 years and she’s the only one who has visited. When I’m back home she takes time out of her day to visit as well. I have family, who won’t even take the 15 mins drive but expect me to go to them even though I drove 6 hours to go down there.

Very pathetic on your friends part…. Have they heard of a train? Assuming this is a uk post as unfamiliar on how public transport works in US!

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