Depression rant

I was diagnosed with depression at like 14 and have been on and off medication for it since (24 now). My depression comes and goes, sometimes it’s bad other times it’s manageable. Here lately it’s been pretty bad, the worst it’s been in a long time, my depression does seem to come around the holidays but this year it feels like other things are adding to it. I don’t want to talk to anyone about it because I don’t know how to explain it and feel like why would they care, I don’t want to talk to people period, I want to block myself from the world. I’m struggling with my kids too, I love them so much but I just feel so inpatient with them and snappy. I try not to be and apologize but I feel like such a shitty mom for it. I feel like my husband and I aren’t on the best of terms, there’s just a distance and disconnect between us that I’m hating but he seems fine with it. I just feel so unimportant lately, unattractive and unloved. I feel so tired, unmotivated and just empty, I feel like I need to cry but can barely get the tears out.

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Depression can make you feel like you have to do this all by yourself, but that is the biggest lie. A lot of what you describe (loving but snapping at your kids, feeling like a sh*t mom, having issues with your partner, being exhausted, unloved, unseen) is so normal, and it helps to talk to other moms who are going through it too. We are all on this app because we're not supposed to do it alone. Pick one way you're comfortable and reach out. If that doesn't work, try one more. Keep trying until you feel the support that is all around you.

Try talking to God. I promise it will help

Definitely talk to someone about it! I used to have depression and gotten medication for mood stabilizers as well bc I was bipolar but I stopped 2 years ago with my meds bc it was causing me to have break downs still.. but also I started taking lots of vitamins and now I’m slowly getting better 😊 I do get my sadness here and there but I do communicate that with my husband and open up to him about it .. and he ends up helping me but also you are not alone please talk to someone or start taking vitamins and change your eating habits to healthier habits bc my therapist told me I need to stop the junk food, caffeines, and start going out.. so now I limit myself on what I eat now and I can feel the difference .. but that’s cuz I had severe anxiety and panick attacks everyday.. trust me it gets better 🥺❤️

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