Advice

So I’m wondering if anyone can offer me some advice here. A family member works in my local hospital and helps out doing caesarean births most of the time. Me and said family member have not spoken now for majority of this pregnancy and I’m really worried incase my birth goes into a section if she’s there as it may sound really petty but It would actually ruin my birth if she was in there. Is there a way I can make sure BEFORE I even go to give birth that she would not be allowed in that room/ near me? Unfortunately we both have different surnames and I feel like she would try be there if she can Sorry it’s such a long one but it’s giving me major anxiety and hoping someone can help 😬😬😬

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That’s a slim chance you would even encounter her if you aren’t having a planned c section and it might fall when she’s not at work hopefully! If you was having a planned c section there may be more of a chance of this request but even then I’m not sure, if your labour ended in an emergency c section the last thing they would be bothered about is trying to swap her for a different staff member who can help as the priority would be yours and the baby’s health. Hope this advice helps and fingers crossed you won’t see her!

As Anneliese has said, there is a slim chance so I’d try not to get too worked up and let it impact this last part of your pregnancy - however if it’s something that really *really* would ruin your whole experience then speak to your midwife re: birth plan and be upfront that you have a family member working in that hospital. Some trusts and professionals do avoid it as it can become a moral grey spot. Obviously in a true emergency there’s very little you’d be able to do (or probably want to, at that point) but use your voice now for sure.

No I totally understand my priorities will be elsewhere. I know my hospital do not allow immediate family to be in there, she is my sister so definitely falls under that category but with us having different surnames I’m unsure whether it would be picked up on. And I know due to how petty she is, it would constantly be brought up that she saw my baby first. I know all this might come across really minor to some people but I know that she’d purposely not say anything just to be in there x

Let them know via your birth plan notes so it will be picked up on. Also make sure you have a birth partner or midwife who will advocate for you.

It doesn't sound petty at all, this is your birthing day and if you're not comfortable with said member potentially being there you must speak up. However, if it's an emergency then you'll require the help, and at that time I can't imagine them prioritising a staff member swap. Chances are you won't see her but there's no harm in voicing your concerns.

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