What should I do 😢

I’m having a bit of a crisis. We moved in with my in laws about 6mo ago with the plan to stay 6mo to a year. Our goal was to save money to buy a house close to them in the same town. They live in a smaller town. Not a lot to do, fairly conservative, religious. For context our pediatrician has God/Jesus signs all over the office (there are only 2 offices to choose from in town). Which I have no problem with, I’m just not that person. We are VERY liberal & not religious at all. So the area doesn’t necessarily fit our vibe. But we have people from both of our families here which is great. And they are superrr supportive with the kids. Which we all know is important. Part of my problem is that I am struggling living with others & feel like we’re ready for our own space - but one of my in laws was recently diagnosed with a terminal illness & that makes it hard to leave. I’m also worried about buying a house here bc of the culture. We used to live in a liberal area within a conservative state & have a ton of friends there. Friends that are our family. Tbh sometimes I wish we would have just stayed there to raise our kids. There’s so much to consider & it’s getting to the point where we need to make a decision. But idk what to do! Any advice?

Show your support

And I’d love to hear your reasoning in the comments! I feel like I just keep having the same two or three circulating thoughts

Hey love. If you need to talk. HMU.

@Ruvia Thank you! 💗 I think I will after these babies go down. I need some outside perspective!

I think it’s worth moving to your own place in town first to truly give out a try without the added stress of living with your in-laws am a sick one at that. If you still hate it after getting your own place, I would say discuss moving back closer to friends or maybe a nearby town that’s more liberal so you can still have the support of your village

@Carmen I do think this would be a good option! But I reallyyy don’t want to rent again. We’ve been renting as a couple for 9 years & I’ve been renting for a total of 12. And we wouldn’t be able to afford to move & buy again if we decide to buy here 😕

I’m in a similar situation as you. I grew up in Portland Oregon and we moved to the south when we got married to be close to my in laws. First Florida, now Tennessee. Tennessee is a lot more religious/conservative than Florida even was but for sure waaaay more than where I’m from. I’m an atheist and very left leaning lol. It’s been a hard adjustment. But we are staying because my fil is in a decline and my husband feels bad. I don’t have a ton of advice but I want you to know I stand in solidarity with you lol.

@Raven🇵🇸 I feel for you!! It’s so tough! We moved from FL to GA. I think it’d be an easier decision if FL politics weren’t so scary. We’re a two mom family & I’d never want our family’s safety to be an issue. But it’s also hard to live somewhere where half of the population doesn’t believe in your marriage. I wish everyone I love would just move somewhere better lol

I think moving to your place in town where your families live is the better option. Blood is thicker than water and it sounds your families are supportive. I too have friends that feel like family but I know in the end it's my parents and in-laws that would 100% back me up.

You have to do what you think is best for you and your family

@Vicky I get that that’s true for some but we don’t really follow that ideology! We have lifelong friends that we’re much closer with than some of our family. Our parents are amazing but our friends are definitely our peace & support 💗

@Sam I agree! It’s just so hard to decide what factors are most important to us

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