Partner doesn’t respect me - don’t know what to do
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Why are you with him? He’s abusing you. & You can easily manage on your own since you’re doing everything anyway! And stop doing anything for him!!! Like at all! I wouldn’t know how you can change a man like that! He’s just ew! You deserve and can get so much better
@Angel realistically I know I should stop doing anything for him, but the drama it will cause I can’t cope with. If I refused to wash his dishes.. guess what? They just won’t get washed no matter how long I leave it. I can’t just leave the housework because he won’t do it and I need to keep my home tidy. I love him and want to keep my family but this has gone too far
How long have you been doing this? His too comfortable that’s why because it’s his way and his used to it. Your doing too much. A proper chat is needed or sorry to say your better off without him your already doing everything yourself….
I agree with @Angel Plese stop doing anything for him including cooking his meals He does not deserve you at all And he will very unlikely change You deserve better dont put up with this You're not a slave Its also not healthy for your kids to see the way he treats you Sounds like a narcissist to me
Have you tried having a private conversation with him regarding household duties… parenting shouldn’t be one sided if both parents are in the home
Depending on the ages of the children maybe they can help clean up after themselves… sometimes you have to walk away and take time for yourself im sorry you have to go through this
Don’t fill up his water, don’t do his laundry, don’t prep his meals, don’t even speak to him. He doesn’t appreciate you and to taunt you like that, he doesn’t care about you. He’s literally watching you overwork and exhaust yourself and giving you more things to do like he gets a kick out of it. He’s not normal . You know that saying “Those who don’t hear must feel” no matter what you say to him he’s not going to care but make him feel what it’s like to not have you there. I know you want to keep your family but at what expense? Your mental health? Your happiness, your dignity ? Your self respect ? Your the first example of what a relationship is like to your kids, don’t let them see him treat you like that. If you’re going to stay with him, he has to want to change.
@Janila the kids are great and don’t cause any mess for me they’re so helpful. He is causing most of the housework as I’m clearing up after him and he’s loading all these tasks and chores on me. I have had the conversation with him many times, the second I say or mention him not helping he gets mad and says ‘we are not the same’ and tells me life isn’t fair and if I don’t like it I should leave him
Has he always been like this ?
@Angel not at the start at all. He was very helpful, independent, respectful, would even do housework at my parents house just to help out willingly. He saw me as an equal and treated me like a queen. After having kids and living together it completely changed. Over the years it has gotten worse and now it’s terrible, he genuinely believes he’s a man and doesn’t have to do these things but because I’m a female it’s my job. It has happened slowly over the years, I didn’t just wake up and decide to be a slave to someone I live with. But now I’m stuck in this cycle
This makes me sad 💔 you’ve got to break the cycle. What’s his relationship like with his parents? Can you speak to them about this? You need to stop doing things for him ( I don’t mean maintaining your home but things personally for him) until he respects you and helps you out with other things. He should especially be helping out with the kids physically, mentally and financially.
Maybe going away for the weekend could show him what it’s like doing stuff by yourself… you can only handle so much and remember actions speak louder than words…. Sometimes you have to step away even when it’s hard to do so… also pray on the situation of you believe in GOD
Girl stand up! The fact you work AND do the house work with no help is crazy my attitude would scare him more than his scared me I stay home and my husband works and he still comes home and cleans and cooks if he sees I need help or was tired that day! He said we are wives not maids! Like u should value yourself enough to not let somebody treat you like Cinderella idgaf if he had a 36 pack if they knew how ugly he was they wouldn’t like him either so it would only be a matter of time before he is telling the next one that same line so I wouldn’t even care he would switch people out more than you would! Stand tf up stop feeling like you are losing if anything you should be the one reminding him to be cool because the amount of men better waiting is crazy 😭 like crazyyyyyyy so he should really relax and chill out and stfu honestly
I would literally play Rammstein on full blast in the morning and have the kids jump on the bed to wake up daddy and then I’d tell that fucker that from now on he takes care of his home himself. Then I’d look for a new place to stay and leave his ass.
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Why cook his food for him when he doesn’t do anything to help out. I would leave him. Fr. It would be easier than being with him and u would one day find someone that actually respects and helps you
I know what you can say to him….. Starts with fu*k and ends with off You are smashing single parenthood - would you consider leaving him so you have one less drama?
Stop doing anything for him I.e cooking, washing his clothes, his water bottle, trainers!!just do the jobs for the house ie cleaning etc and jobs for the kids. Tell him you've stopped because you have too much to do and he has no respect for you. He is abusing you and controlling you and that is domestic abuse xx
He sounds like a right dick! I’m sorry but I couldn’t be with someone like that he sounds so entitled and full of himself 🤢 you’re not even getting the bare minimum and he’s talking like he’s better than you which he isn’t! Leave him. showing your kids a healthy relationship is much better than showing them this one it’s not normal
I think he might be too far gone, it’s one thing not to pull his weight, but to speak to you this way and make demands and take the literal piss out of you is too much. He does not sound like he even likes you as a human being, in which case what is the point.
I’m sorry, a grown man can’t refill his own water bottle? He needs to get a grip. Get on the phone to his mother 🤣 Tell her he’s coming to live with her since he wants to be treated like a child! Honestly you are not a slave. You are a person. An individual. You are allowed to do things for yourself. You are allowed to go out, go to the gym. I’m sorry, if you are “partners” then he should play his fucking part.
On top of that, I have taken myself to sleep on the couch because I don’t want to sleep next to him. He has made me take everything I need from the bedroom for the morning, out tonight because he doesn’t want me to go into the bedroom in the morning and disturb him while he’s sleeping