Just a rant

I’m a SAHM my partner works. He covers bills, I get food stamps and cover all food. If I sell anything of mine or my sons I get necessities shampoo, conditioner, toothpaste, diaper cream etc. I don’t grab anything until it’s absolutely necessary like I cut open my toothpaste and use it all before grabbing more with his money. Well we cloth diaper because it’s cheaper, but we’re expecting baby #2 so I’m trying to get more. I asked for $25 to get 16 diapers and he yelled at me saying I need to be more responsible with money. I have worked side hustle jobs, sold my things, etc to buy everything I have gotten, and he won’t help with $25 for OUR child. It’s just draining I feel like he doesn’t want to help at all because I want cloth so it should be me paying for them. Jokes on him if we did disposable it would cost him a small fortune. He doesn’t get me anything for holidays or birthdays, I have to beg to go out to eat for birthdays. It’s not like I ask for things. I don’t use his money on nothing. He’s even fighting me on Christmas for our older because he doesn’t want to spend money. It’s pissing me off. I realize he’s the only one working but I have NO money I can’t do anything unless he offers or I sell my belongings or my sons. Like wtf.
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If that's how he is when baby is born and a couple months. I would find a job and let him pay for day care since he doesn't see how hard it is. When he have to pay for daycare he will see that he have to spend more than what you're asking for.

@Kimmy Issue is I can’t send my kids to daycare.. I’m terrified of something happening I don’t even let people babysit… He also doesn’t want me to get a job unless it’s WFH so I can watch the kids and work to have my own money.

Well get a work from home job I wouldn't want to depend on someone like that. Sounds like he's not someone you can depend on. Having to sell you and your son's belongings sounds wrong.

Do you homeschool or plan to home school?

Yeah this is abuse

U still staying there is a choice im startin to read more of these and its makin a lot of sense that you value yourself low that’s why you let other people do it! Once you value yourself at a certain level you will never take a discount period! Stand up

@Aryyy How did I talk low of myself? Where am I suppose to go? Live in my car with a 1yo till CPS takes him?

@Kimmy I’ve applied to pushing 100 WFH jobs and have gotten not a single call back. I do plan to homeschool

No ma’am. But it’s ALWAYS A WAY! Never a dead end literally gotta do whatever you gotta do and sometimes that involves things you don’t like but to be happy is worth it!

A shelter. Most wfh jobs aren’t going to work unless you have childcare

This is terrible

You two need financial counseling if you are going to stay together. The way he is treating you is wrong. What is he doing with his money? I'm sorry but bills shouldn't be taking an entire salary. The family budget needs to be out in the open and he needs to open and honest with what he is doing the the family's money. If he refuses to consider his income family money and is making you stay home with the kids he needs to give you a salary of your own otherwise he needs to pay someone else to do it. You should not be watching his kids for free.

@Anna That’s the thing, I know where it all goes. Savings. This all started a few months ago when our oldest was 6 months? His parents dragged would come over and go we’re going here go get ready and it was a lot of things the kiddo would enjoy in our area. We would go and they would expect us or SILs man at the time to pay. We learned quickly and stopped but that was after a few times and a few hundred each time.it dropped his savings about 3k or so. Since then he doesn’t want to spend a thing. His income he has $500ish left over in a month and I don’t ask for anything or to do anything. Partially because I know, partially because I’m happy getting needs met and being done. I’m not a materialistic person. He’s a great guy, after I had a MC a while back he brought me about $200 of my favorite thing as an “I’m sorry I hope you feel better”. I truly wonder if this is him panicking about his savings being dropped so substantially and then immediately finding out we’re expecting..

In our 15 years he’s never been like this until recently. It doesn’t give him a reason to berate me or yell at me nor help with his child, but I am trying to understand where this is coming from. I am still trying to get a WFH job so it’s not all on his shoulders with flipped hours, but idk how that would work. Regardless. I don’t want to throw away a 15 year relationship for a misunderstanding that’s only been roughly 6m. I don’t get him Christmas or anything either my point with that was I don’t ask for anything I don’t get anything. 🙃

Maybe he has a good reason then. Have you asked him what his intentions for the savings are? I still feel like you should have a little bit of spending money even if it is just $50.

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@Anna I believe he does, it’s annoying hence the rant, but I understand a little. It’s for emergency’s. Car breaks down, ac goes out, whatever. He pays for most everything up front so if there’s ever a big expense it’s covered so he has no debt other than house. Even cars are all paid. I just asked for one thing and he got snippy with me which pissed me off. Then refused to help. Which pissed me off more cuz wtf? You can spare $25 for your child my dude. You spend maybe $50 on necessity’s a months and that’s estimating high… I have paid for all 30+ diapers that I have gotten all by myself $300 worth or so.

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