Pre teen daughter
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Ohhhhhh hell no! First of all I would have NEVER let her leave in the first place. That makes her think that she’s grown enough to make those decisions and she’s not! My oldest will be 14 in a few months and that attitude gets crazy! I took her phone away a week before Halloween. Not giving it back until next year if she can consistently not have an attitude with me. Her grades are amazing but that attitude is willlld. ( she had a secret bf at school and the way he talks to her, her dumbass laughs and reacts to it without knowing what he really says ) fyi boner, virgin and other nasty bs that someone her age don’t need to be having conversations about!) I make her wash dishes. Fold / put away laundry. Flip the couches and vaccume. Can’t use her laptop unless for school and she’s wayyyyyyyy more pleasant without that phone / social media. She just finished track but it’s seasonal so now I’m looking for a senior citizens home to have her volunteer.
She's probably just looking for independence and going through the teen phase really. My advise is don't take it personal ever. And be kind and understanding with her even when she's angry. Possibly even especially when she's angry. She needs to know you are on her side in life as it all becomes harder and changes so rapidly at this age. Do you guys have chats? You could try to chat with her and say how can we make you happier here let's work together. My daughter is 11 and my moto is kill em with kindness.. I just mean kill those bad vibes with love. The more anger or sass the more love they need. Not saying let them get away with being awful by any means.... just think from their point of view when you can and take a breath before you respond. Mostly when my daughter has had a terrible mean moment with me I just need to walk away and take a min really, dont forget to regulate your own emotions to help them through theirs. Also random but try to connect with her in moments where everything is okay.
... even if it's something silly like asking her who sings that song saying hm I kinda like it lol or laughing at a joke together asking her hey how do you feel about this random thing idk. I feel like the more connection the more they get less angry with us because we are less of "the authority" ya know what I mean. Idk just what helps with me so I figured I'd share. It's a hard age tho I know that is for sure. Keep loving it will pass.
Honestly. Put fear in her I was that child Gave my mom headache. She sent me to MN for half a year to live with my aunt. Call one your very firm family members if you have to Or even try to have her pay for her own things. My mom tried that on me. My daughter has a strong attitude. All I do is take away her electronics and have her read a book.