I am so glad I had a girl cause I think this would be me if Iād had a boy! I struggled so much with boys names. So I relate. If your husband only disagrees because of the hassle then I think do it! And now while he is too young to know better. Itās only 4 months into an entire lifetime. If itās costly to change it legally right now, then just wait to change it officially until youāre all settled in your new place but you can still start calling him by his new name and tell all your friends now, do the legal bit later. Just say that once you got to know him, you realised he isnāt an [old name], he is a [new name]. Itāll be fine! Also I am so curious what is the name šš
What is the name?
I mean yes your husband has to agree but once that's sorted, don't be held back by what other people will say or react on social media. You don't have to do a post or announce it at all. Anyone confused can just ask!
@Rhiannon thank you for this! Definitely what I needed to hear I think! His name is Jaxon, weāve been calling him Jax for short and the name I love for him is Jude
@Diana his name is Jaxon but love Jude for him
@Alex thank you! This is such a good point. For some reason, this and telling family members was what was putting me off the most
the biggest hassle would be changing the documents, but if you donāt do it now then i donāt think you can do it later if you wait much more. use the name you really love. your husband shouldnāt be ātired of hearing āabout something if itās truly upsetting you. you should do it if you want to do it
My little boy is christened Richard as I wanted him to have my Dadās first name but we call him by his middle name. Heās only Richard on official documents. Could you change the name you wanted to be his middle name on paper but call him by that name if you prefer it? We also sometimes call my little boy little Rich or Ritchie Rich as a bit of a joke so we still refer to it and sort of use both and makes it not so weird for family.
i think you technically only get a year to finalize on a name if you decide to change it? if you are going to change it, iād start the process now. both names jaxon and jude are really cute to me so you couldnāt go wrong either way. i think youāre putting all this pressure on yourself when it isnāt that deep. if you love jude, go for it. doesnāt matter what anyone else thinks. theyāll get over it in no time. and as for your toddler, theyāll start to get use to it too the more you correct them. good luck hun.
I honestly like Jax/Jaxon better but if it bothers you, you can just call him Jude instead of Jax/Jaxon and change documents later
how would you feel about keeping Jaxon and calling him Jack?
You could just call him Jude, then add it as a middle name? Loads of people are known by thier middle names :) but I think if you really dislike it that much, just do it once youāve moved but start calling him Jude now and donāt worry about what everyone else thinks! Sometimes things like this are built up loads in your head, when actually people around you might think āoh thatās unusualā¦.ā And then move on with thier life and not ever think about it again šš¤£ so donāt worry about what people will think xx
Do it. It doesnāt feel right in your heart and it never will. Have the conversation with your partner when both in a good head space and say look I want his name changed and be final with it and be confident on the new name. You can do the documentation and serious stuff after your holiday. Make it fun for sibling when you tell them the new name and stop posting online / hide old things online for now. Doesnt matter what people think. People will always have something to say regardless. Tbh I honestly think its refreshing once you stop worrying about others opinions and posting. Itās no one else business ā¤ļø
@Chelsea thank you for this! It was all pointless anyway, just called our airline and weāll have to book a whole new ticket for him if we are to change his name š© as the ticket is not amendable. So frustrating!
Trusted by 5M+ women
Trusted by 5M+ women
The sooner the better. I've also thought about changing my daughters name. I love what she has but the other option is just chefs kiss. But I have settled and have my other options locked and loaded for the last baby.
I was in the same boat and just did it. Spent ages worrying about what everyone would think but no one actually cared and I felt so much better afterwards
Why did you introduce a name to your 3 year old when you wanted another name? Does your husband want to change his name if it wasn't a hassle? Why was Jude your second choice if you prefer it?
@Nell thank you! Just out of curiosity, how old was your LO when you changed it?
@Hannah to be honest, we had always for some reason had the name āJacksonā set for a boy, so when we found out it was a boy we just started calling bump ābaby Jacksonā so she obviously caught on to that. We considered a few other options but every time I suggested a name to my husband, it was always either āhmm not sureā, ānot too much of a fanā, āahh yeah itās alrightā. The only two that we were both quite set on was Jackson and Jude, it wasnāt until a few weeks before I gave birth we sat down as I wanted to start prepping all the personalised bits, and as my husband is a Jew, we realised this could become a joke and therefore get teased at school for being āJude the jewā so we settled for Jaxon. I started then buying all the personalised bits, and told our family who then started sending us personalised gifts. It was during the World Cup actually that I kept seeing Jude Bellinghamās name pop up and thinking I still really love Jude. So I told family we were to change it and they
@Hannah went a little mad to be honest. My mum was furious as she had spent loads of money on a personalised bracelet, my MIL said itās not a nice name due to the connotation of Jude in the Bible (theyāre Jewish so not that it matters to be honest), and everyone commented on how my daughter was already calling the bump Jaxon so I then gave in and decided to go ahead with it which was silly as I was not 100% but I thought Iād get used to it once he was here. 2 months after he was born I bought it up with my husband as the name still wasnāt sitting well with me, the topic was immediately shut down by not only him but his parents
@Hannah my husband really isnāt that bothered by which name we choose to be honest (which was the most frustrating part to begin with), he is just annoyed at all of the paperwork we will have to get done since we are moving abroad in 6 weeks!!! To answer your third question, as mentioned I think āJacksonā was always subconsciously set in stone for a boy as a few years back we liked the name. It also doesnāt help that Iām a teacher so thereās been quite a few boys names that Iāve loved in the past but sometimes been put off. We didnāt really consider many others, and I guess it was the āsafeā option as we had already said weād go for it if we ever had a boy. Looking back now, I donāt think we ever properly sat down during my pregnancy and went through a list of names, it was names that Iād come across and suggest (I had quite a few but my husband was super picky or impartial to most). Jude really grew on me in the last few weeks of pregnancy and by then I felt it was too late
I understand that this is difficult, and I would suggest you get the paperwork and fill it out, but don't sign it and then have another conversation with your partner. If you have done everything or say you will and he still isn't interested in changing the name, I feel you may have to hold on to Jude for a potential future baby. I can understand where your family is coming from, too. I was torn with my sons middle name. We gave him two, but I wanted to use my grandfathers first name. There were reasons we chose not to use it, but I still, 3 years on, feel really sad that we didn't. I hope you find an outcome you can live with.
ā
ā
ā
ā
ā
ā
ā
ā
ā
ā
ā
ā
Do it