You guys, how do I handle rude children?

How old is your daughter? Sorry that she’s being treated like this.

Honestly, when they are rude I would just say let’s all play nice together instead of shoving or pushing and then try to engage them into something they are both interested in and just be optimistic and extra enthusiastic about them playing together. At end of the day all children can get a bit sassy pants. She will find her people . Don’t worry I’m sure she’ll find someone who is sweet like her

@Jem She just turned 3. My daughter is so sweet, friendly & polite I’m just shocked all these kids are so mean. Thanks :/ it’s really sad to see especially when I’m trying to encourage her to socialize and make friends and none of the other kids or parents make an effort.

@LOVEE Yeah, I’ll have to try that. But the mama bear instinct overpowers how I feel sometimes so I just get really upset but I try to remain calm. I try to imagine they’re my children, but at the same time I don’t want to tell other ppls kids what to do or how to act, it’s so awkward for me when the parents are right there not doing anything. But I’ll try to be extra positive next time thank you 🙏

In that case I’ve def seen that behavior with kids that age. Some of it is developmental at that toddler stage. I do think it’s the parents job to intervene. I just distract my toddler and we do something else, I don’t even entertain the behavior. There are nice children out there and I’m hoping that she finds some nice friends. I would also talk to her about what to do when that happens and telling her she can express her feelings to you. It’s hard and I’m always keeping an eye when my kids interact with other children because I don’t like rude behavior. My son found a friend in his swim class. I do think you have to look for parents that parent the same style as you or close and you might be able to find a match for your daughter.

When stuff like that happens to my daughter I tell her it’s not her fault they don’t want to play with her right now. Then I just play stuff with her. I don’t try to introduce her to too many people at once because it’s probably overwhelming so like if the second person she interacts with doesnt want to play, I will stop trying to push it til next time. It might be different if it was like preschool and I wasn’t with her at the time but she’s with me all the time

Yeah, I understand you totally that is why I just try to remain calm and use a stern voice, but also make sure I am not speaking too harshly because at the end the day they are still children as well and they are still learning and growing too and most of the time they just need adult criticism. It hurts to see someone be mean to your child like the other day. My seventh month year old was with his cousin that is four and my seventh month year-old likes to grab things so he grabbed his face and kind of scratched him because he was too close and then the four-year-old squeezes his arm so hard and I just didn’t know what to think at the moment but that is exactly what I said and then I realized a 4 -year-old is only going to react to what hurt them and not that it’s a baby so I had to react in a mom way with a stern voice so that the four-year-old doesn’t do this again to a baby who doesn’t know better and didn’t mean to cause any harm .

Children at this age don’t really know what social is, so you can’t blame them at all. Some toddlers might be more open to share and play with others, but there will be some that are quite territorial and will not like to share what it is they’re playing. They’re not rude or being mean intentionally, they’re just children. Not every babies were raised the same, not all parents take out their children that often to social gatherings and/or any other outdoor activities. It is important that we as parents recognise that and just teach our children how it is ok to wait and take turns. If another child refused to share then you can tell yours to wait until they’re done playing and then they can have a go. No one is going to admit this, but parents that take their children to playgroups is usually just for their babies to play and meet other babies, not all mums are there to make friends. So you should not put your expectation on them either.

Some babies aren’t even that aware of their surroundings either, so if they accidentally bump into your baby, then it is just that. If they are a bit physical like pushing and/or trying to slap your baby’s hands away, that’s also normal. You can bring it up to their parents and you would just have to look out for your own because babies are babies. 3 years old are not that old to know exactly what’s good and bad, what’s right and wrong.

Oh this hurts my heart ❤️‍🩹 Whenever I’ve had a rude child do or say something with my kids, I will just firmly say “she is allowed to play with this too, it’s for everyone to take turns” in a public setting. A 3 year old literally spat at my 10 month old at a soft play centre on the weekend, his mum was sat with her friends having coffee no where near him, he put his hand out and said “noooo” when she was just stood looking at him - I told him she is allowed to be in here too it’s the baby area - she has just started walking so was taking steps towards him and he literally blew a spit raspberry at her. I was mortified and said “please do not spit at my baby. That is rude.” And told the manager because I wasn’t sure which parent was his at the time. I just make sure not to raise my voice but be firm in case the parents are also rude lol

I usually stare down the parent when their child is being mean and they aren’t stepping in. Or I’ll loudly tell my child “some kids are just mean and we can’t change that but we don’t have to play with them” and redirect my child to something else. Some parents allow their kids to be terrible and it’s the fault of the parent.

I don’t address other peoples kids not the negatives anyhow unless I’m saying something very kind like would you like to share etc . I keep In mind that they’re toddlers or kids and that the behavior is normal at that age. However my son is very social on his own at 3 and so I don’t really hover too much I allow him the space to move about freely on his own while in the company of other children since he’s very comfortable with doing so and will only intervene if it’s necessary if someone is hitting etc or I need to address something immediately. I respond my removing my son from the situation and will usually move him elsewhere that’s more productive/ suitable for him

Unfortunately this is how some parents act these days. Not the kids fault. Bit if parents don't parents their kids I would. I would say something like "let's all play together buddy? What's your name? Oh that's a great name buddy! She is *your kids name*. How do you wanna play together ? ..." Or something like this. That's tiring to parent your kids and also HaVE to parents other people's kids but it's in your daughter s interest so... But yeas that's not cool

How old are these kids? That’s normal behavior if they’re 2-3 years old but weird that the parents aren’t stepping in and trying to teach them.

Eh. I also noticed that. I’m a FTM and never been around lots of kids. My son is 16m and I am SHOCKED at how rude some kids are and how absent and rude some parents are. One example, my son kept getting pushed away from one play area by an older girl. He’s so sweet, he kept coming back because he wanted to play with those tiles, and she kept hogging the WHOLE thing and pushed him away THREE times. No parent ever stepped in.

I find myself frequently having to gentle parent other people's kids. Even if the adults are around I'll say things like "That's not nice," "how would you feel if your friend did that to you?" Along with suggestions of what they could do together or how they could do things differently. If the parents aren't socializing that's their problem. I think people in general have a problem socializing now.