Sahm

Hi everyone- just wanted to see what everyone else does. Been with my partner a couple of years, have a 3 month old baby together. I’m on maternity leave and have always paid my way, my partner is on very good wages potentially increasing to the 80k mark in the next year. He works shifts with no regularity and it’s proving very difficult for me to find a job that fits around his hours which forces me to either- stay at home, become self employed (have nothing in mind or any real trade) or go back to work and put my son in nursery. My partner is very up and down with his feelings on this and wants me to go back to work then tells me to be a sahm then tells me he still expects me to contribute financially and/or I wouldn’t have direct access to money so I should consider starting a business. Basically I feel as though he can’t make up his mind on what he thinks I should do or what he’s prepared to do financially. I’m keen to return to work so that I can have financial independence and I found a great nursery and knowing my son (very alert already needing constant stimulation) I think he would love it. My partner thinks I should be a sahm but isn’t prepared to share finances - I havent had a straight answer on how he feels but I gather it would be he pays the bills to the penny for household bills and anything else I would have to ask for everything and it may be up to him. We would be saving several hundreds of pounds a month on nursery fees and I have around £500 a month of personal bills I need to have covered for my car etc. I feel I would be doing a job and should have access to money without asking for permission for everything or having to ask in advance for him to transfer something which he may or may not do. He has semi recently also mentioned several times that he’s paying the bills and therefore I don’t get a say in things/arguments. I’m paying my personal bills and food shopping with my mat leave pay but he is covering household eg mortgage/electric. Am I being unreasonable? What do I do?