When your only source of happiness is your kids ..
Christmas and kids birthdays is the only thing you have to look forward to, no family or friends. You don’t do anything for yourself because you feel it’s a waste and say “kids could have it” “the money can go on them” “my childhood is over it’s the kids turn to enjoy”
It’s hard when you’ve been viewed worthless growing up.. no gifts, birthdays, praise, compliments… nothing
So you grow up thinking you don’t deserve anything, could spend ££££ on kids but can’t get my self a new pack of knickers.. I don’t do it on purpose I just think “why?? When that money can go on the kids”
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I went on a shopping spree for myself a couple of months ago because I needed new clothes and felt so guilty for spending money on myself and not my daughter
This is how my mom was and I’m breaking the cycle. I want my daughters to see me out and about, buying myself things, taking time to myself and taking time to see my friends. It’s hard because I do want to be with them most of the time and spend all my money on them, but I don’t want them to think they have to give every last bit of themselves to be a good mom. You can’t pour from an empty cup. Treat yourself!
I very rarely buy myself anything unless it is something I really need. I just prefer spending money on my little boy.
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Same. I always tell myself “it’s not my turn to worry about myself” or splurge on me. With 2 under 2 it’s rarely my turn to even shower or brush my hair. I do have family and a few close friends but I drown silently alone because they shame me for my house being messy or tell me I “chose to have them so it’s all on me” As though my choice of having kids was bad and they’re nothing but a burden. I love them to death I just could definitely use that village everyone talks about… Maybe just for a 10 minute shower or something 😭