When did you feel ready for another baby

So I keep seeing people saying they’re pregnant with their second or thinking about trying soon & as someone who thought they’d have lots of babies I’m here with my 11mo like HOW?!?!? How is anyone finding time for anything other than looking after the one they have, I don’t mean this in a judgemental way I mean I’m genuinely in awe and just can’t understand it, I feel like he takes up my whole life and I’m kinda looking forward to when he’s a bit older and more independent (I love him lots and lots but this age is so full on😂) But yes is it bc of his current age, do people feel differently with time? I definitely don’t want to be one and done but I’m so scared of adding anything on top of what I already do.
Like
Share Mobile
Share
  • Share

Show your support

It took my husband & I 3 years before we even considered trying for another baby😅 Our eldest turned 4 shortly after I had my baby. We have no plans to have anymore children now.

I'm with you stuck in a cosleeping rut since 7mo. Got a toddler bed yesterday and he lasted 30 mins before waking for boob. I mean I guess we could have had some action in 30 mins but it's a bit hard to plan it with that much precision and actually enjoy it?! And also I am not ready mentally, emotionally, financially or in terms of having enough space in our flat lol. Quite apart from not having the opportunity to do the deed 😅 Some babies are less clingy and sleep independently and that must make it easier or maybe some have more family support or more resilience to stress and find it easier to relax expectations?

We’re going to try again around babies 1st birthday. My logic is we are already sleep deprived and restricted by routine naps etc and we only want two children so makes sense to us to have them close together and then we can grow up as a family together and eventually life will be easier. I cannot imagine getting slightly more freedom and sleep and then starting all over again! Everyone is so so different though there’s no right or wrong 😊

@Sarah🦄 how are you finding it the 2nd time round and with another baby? I know that’s a pretty big question but does it feel just as hard? I do think that’d be a nice age gap for me too but idk how I’d feel my baby finally having a bit more independence and then starting again 😭

@Alex maybe that’s it, a lot of people speak about their first baby being really chill & the second being completely wild but I think I got a super clingy, super active wild child the first time around that I can’t imagine any different 😂I absolutely love his personality but it’s the type of character that wants me all to his self to adding another baby feels impossible in this situation

10 years 😂🙈

@Yasmin that makes complete sense and was my mindset too until recently, I was a super sleepy pregnant lady and he’s on the move 24/7 so I don’t know how I’d manage. But goodluck that’s so exciting I hope it all goes well💕

Surprisingly better than what I thought it would be. Before I had my 2nd baby the thought of going through another pregnancy & starting again with a newborn baby horrified me. Then I had the birth that I wanted & when I held my new baby daughter, I felt instantly that I'd made the right decision. It has been tough with my eldest being a bit older & she's taken time to adapt to having a new baby in her life. She adores her baby sister & they play lovely together. A lot of her friends have got younger siblings as well, so I guess that they can relate to one another. What is good is that when I was on maternity leave & my eldest was at nursery, I had one to one time with my youngest & it was lovely.

@Yasmin I feel exactly the same as this! Also we have to have ivf to conceive so this plays a big factor for us. It took us so long to get our daughter it might take just as long again. I also think it depends on your baby. I have friends who are one and done as their babies have been hard work. I’ve not experienced having a clingy baby, she hasn’t had separation anxiety yet either. (Probably jinxing myself here) She happily plays independently whilst I get my jobs done and I find it easy to get out the house to run errands with her etc. The toughest thing I found so far was the 8 month sleep regression but that went after 4/5 weeks and she now sleeps through again. I fully expect to have a wild child second time around if we are so lucky 😂 x

@Sarah🦄 awww that’s so lovely to hear, I think the little one going off to nursery is the only way id manage 😂definitely leaning towards that kind of age gap!

@Shannon congratulations on your pregnancy! It sounds like you’ve put in so much work to make it a smooth as possible transition for both your babies that’s so amazing, you’re going to be great😄

@Amy do you feel like you did anything to make your baby not clingy or do u feel they were always that way, I was super anxious during the newborn phase and I’d run to pick him up as soon as he made a noise & till this day I wonder if that had a part in him wanting to be attached to my hip

@Liza sounds perfect to me🤣

@Amy I have PCOS and I was very lucky that my baby was a happy surprise as I had been told that I’d almost certainly need some help so that also plays a factor for us. We may not be so blessed with an easy journey next time around and so wanting babies close in age means the sooner we start hopefully the better 🤞🏼 My baby is super high needs always has been and very clingy. Also sleeps terribly 😂 so my logic is number 2 cannot be anymore needy and at least if they are I have experience 😅

No nothing! She’s just always been chill, so chilled in fact she was born 2 weeks late and she was stuck in me for 2 hours and her heart rate didn’t dip once. 😂🙈 All the midwives kept telling me what a happy baby she was and it’s just continued. My mum tells me I was also a chilled baby so maybe from me 🤷‍♀️. I keep thinking I have it all to come when I hear stories from others x

Try today for free
Scan the QR code and join the app
to connect with women at a similar stage in life.
Download Peanut to connect with women at a similar stage in life.

StarStarStarStarStar-Half

Trusted by 5M+ women

Logo
Try today for free
Scan the QR code and join the app
to connect with women at a similar stage in life.
Download Peanut to connect with women at a similar stage in life.

StarStarStarStarStar-Half

Trusted by 5M+ women

Logo

@Yasmin aw good luck here’s hoping you are blessed with a 2nd 🤞🏻💕. Yes exactly! Love the thinking x

Has its ups and downs. It’s good because first one can look after himself and help you as well. Bad because you are kind of starting from the beginning so it’s like having a first one again. Also it’s challenging to find thing that are interesting for the whole family to do.

I feel the same way. I was so sick for the first 20 weeks of my pregnancy that I would be so scared I wouldn't be able to look after my daughter if I was pregnant now. I'm really hoping as she gets older I feel better about the idea because I really don't want to be one and done, just the idea of being pregnant whilst looking after a baby and working fills me with so much anxiety! My daughter is also very chilled out and everyone tells me a second would be wild 😂😂😂

We have a 6 year gap and it's great. My eldest is obsessed with her brother and is like his second mum 😅

Read more on Peanut
Trending in our community