Toddler hitting

I was told to say “hitting hurts. You can hit this other thing instead” and run over to a spot where there’s a pillow dedicated to this. I have a 12 month old though and so far what I’ve done is to say “biting hurts me. You can bite this toy instead” and it seems to be okay? At least it’s not escalating the behavior lol

Model gentle touch. Young children don't understand the concept of being told not to do something, but they do understand being told to do something else instead. Say ow that hurts, let's use our gentle hands and then show him what that means and ask him to practice. Work on praising the positive behavior instead of punishing the negative one. If he doesn't stop then physically separate him from whomever he's hitting for a minute and then give him another chance. If he continues to hit after the break, again model gentle hands, and again remove yourself. It may not happen immediately, but be consistent and he'll learn.

Immediately after every single offense discipline make a promise and follow through immediately no chances don't count if they hit it's immediately to whatever form of discipline you normally use then when that's done don't act differently like he's a bad kid or anything cuz that'll teach resentment but when he repeats the actions immediately stop it and discipline again and repeat he will start to see he's getting nowhere with that action and stop kids are like puppies when you are potty training they have to have consistency

We try to avoid negative words (don't, stop, no hitting) and say things like "when you hit me, that makes me feel sad" or "hitting isn't very kind and it hurts mommy/daddy/whoever" and follow up with showing them what they can do with their hands instead (play with toys, high fives, pretending to eat, clap, etc)... it worked well with my 3 year old when she was younger, and now we are working on it with my 19 month old. 😊

My almost three year old has started going through the hitting stage and he knows exactly what he is doing. Sometimes it’s out of spite, and sometimes he’s doing it to get attention but if he’s done it multiples times even after we’ve said no he’ll sit by the door for two minutes.