Am I wrong for this?

My husband didn’t go to work today. However, he does work a lot. Well I’m tired. We had a very long day today with the kids. He of course goes to sleep first. Here I am with the kids. I’m so freaking tired as well but yet here I am with them. My oldest said she was hungry so I was feeding her. My youngest is a Velcro baby so here I am with her all over. My oldest finished eating and I’m fighting with her to go to bed but she keeps jumping on the bed and thinking she’s cool. I stepped out to turn off the light from the kitchen and as soon as I entered the room she fell off the bed. We co sleep so her dad woke up once he heard her screaming and crying. Me as a tired human start telling her “that’s what you get because you don’t listen”. She cries out for her dad only. I swear I don’t wanna be like my mom because that’s something she would say and my mom can be very verbally aggressive. So I try to hold it more rants. Then of course I keep talking. I tell him what happened and it’s all because she’s not listening but I know she’s just young and trying to enjoy her life but I’m just so tired. Yet here he is sleeping! I get he’ll go to work tomorrow but he’ll go to work half day only and I also need help because I’m also tired not just him. My baby still feed every two to three ours at night so I don’t even get much rest as well. Yet he blames me that they have poor sleeping habits but yet doesn’t help me out them to sleep early because he just goes on and on about they are “used to it” so there’s nothing he can do. Like c’mon. Is it really only my fault? I’m a sahm but I can’t possibly be responsible for everything. He needs to just push through his sleep and help out. I can’t manage the kids and take care of myself too. Or am I wrong??

Show your support

I hate when a man doesn’t work and then says he’s tired after he did nothing all day. He should atleast help with the older one while you take care of the baby in another room.

Girl they try it!! Mine tried the same tactic, we were both at home. So, I got all my sleep stuff, locked myself in the spare bedroom and just woke up. He must have dealt with bedtime fine because I knocked out and was unbothered. Try that next time, force him to deal.

Listen, even when a man works and woman stays home (which is also my situation) it’s not the MAN who gets to have all the rest. You both have children, you may be their primary caregiver during the hours he’s at work but it should be EQUAL once he is home. He does half the responsibilities of the kids. If you don’t get down time, why does he? Being a stay at home raising kids is the hardest job in the world - without a question. He needs to respect that and be looking for ways to take care of you and replenish your well

Here’s what I suggest. 1. Tell him you need more rest AND take it 2. Alternate who does the bed time routine (we do ever other day but find what works for you) 3. Once he is home have him do a bit more (I wfh and once my fiancé gets home he does all the diaper changes) Communication is key in these situations so you don’t end up hating each other

communication needs to be up there especially couples who have kids before you both start going against each other. It happens but this is the time when it tests your relationship. Hope you manage to have a proper chat with him in a calm setting.

I have realized that you just have to learn to keep ask for help until they get used to it.I used to assume that my husband should know he’s supposed to help me out with somethings , but some men are wired that way. If we don’t ask, they assume we are fine and we’ve got it always at the end of the day we women are burned out and sometimes always angry. So what I Do now is ask for help , ohh babe could you please help me do this , he dares not say no tho else I’ll let all hell loose. But this has been working for me

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌