Am I being sensitive?
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I don't think it's bad that he stays home all day on his day off, as why not? As long as your daughter is cared for then why should he HAVE to go out?
I didn’t say he HAS to go out, I’m talking about how it’s double standards. He expects me to either be out of the house or quiet if we are home when he is working but when I’m working he doesn’t hold himself to the same. If you think putting her in front of the tv for 8 hours, barely interacting with her is good parenting then that’s your opinion
@Sorrel thanks I definitely have been a bit miffed by his attitude. He isn’t a lazy partner or parent most of the time, I’m just trying so hard to keep her occupied and away from the tv and he’s not on board. He apologised anyway so that’s made me feel better about it
I get you, I would be upset too. However I understand people have different levels of energy etc. I’m an introvert and going out sometimes gives me anxiety and I won’t lie, I also wfh and some days my little girl watches way too much Tv that I would like but it doesn’t make me a bad or lazy parent.
I hear that, I struggle with social & health anxiety for which I have therapy and medication so taking her out is huge for me too as I constantly over analyse the interactions or what germs we might pick up. I also have days where I’m not at my best and she watches extra tv but this isn’t every time as it seems to be with him. We have all the toys and books in the world to keep her occupied in the house he just doesn’t make the effort 😫
That would upset me too, fine if he doesn’t want to leave the house but he can’t just plonk your LO in front of the telly all day.
You’re not being sensitive I would sit him down and say something like: “Here are my parenting goals: (give your expectations) I’d really like to know your parenting goals. (Let him give his) How can we work together to make sure this is happening?” And if limited screen time isn’t on his list maybe bring up the fact that screens are detrimental to children’s brain development if given too much exposure. Explain how you both work equally so you need to both parent equally and that this isn’t really a debate on whether or not changes need to be made. It’s a discussion on how to make it happen
Glad that it’s not the norm and he’s apologised for his reaction. If you’re happy for her to have some screen time maybe agree a limit that you’d be happy with? I agree it’s fine (and sometimes needed!) to have the odd lazy day here and there but this sounds excessive. I think it also puts the burden on you to be all singing and dancing on your day with her because you know she won’t do much when she’s with him. Is there a local group or something he could take her to so you know she’s done at least one screen-free activity that day? Or could he do the weekly shop with her on that day so they’re getting out and about for a bit?
Yeah every week I give him a suggestions of things happening like a nature walk (she would love this) at the local reserve, a cheer tots place, she has library membership and loves going. Honestly the list is endless cos some things are only on certain days and I can’t take her as I’m working. I definitely do allow more screen time than I’d like sometimes I know it’s needed at points but it’s when it’s every time he’s responsible for her when I’m making so much effort that I get frustrated 😫
No I’d find that annoying too, he sounds lazy. It’s ok to have different parenting styles but sounds like he’s just using it as a day off for himself rather than to spend quality time together. Also I don’t think 6 is an unusual bath time for a 2yo, that would be early for me!