SAHM's how much money do you get?

I don’t get an allowance. If I need things I just buy them 🤷🏼‍♀️

Seems almost like your a child who gets an allowance. But I'm not judging or anything. I would just buy what I needed didn't matter the amount.

@Christina🤱🏼🍂☕️♈️, my question accounted for those who don't get sent money. How much do you spend in a week or 2?

@Kendra Budd, nope, not at all. I ask for money for appointments, bills, and groceries. How much do you generally spend in a week or 2?

I didn’t answer the poll cuz it differs greatly between one week and two weeks. Over two weeks, I definitely spend more than $500 but maybe not so in just one week

I get $2000 sent to me at the beginning of the month and I pay the electric bill, streaming services, insurance bill, credit card bill, groceries, and any doctor bills that show up (I’m 36 weeks pregnant and our insurance doesn’t fully cover extra visits for ultrasounds or other tests). I do try to spend a little extra to get some lunch out occasionally (like once a month) and any clothes we may need. I rarely go over the $2000 unless we had extra bills and I’ll just ask for the amount needed or have him pay for groceries and he doesn’t have a problem with it

I am in the UK so finances are very different but what I will say is that my husband has never ever controlled money because I watched my father degrade my mother my whole life over money. My mother was disabled and he was sure to make sure she knew he paid for everything, if things were tight one month he'd make sure she knew SHE spent too much. My husband's wages and my disability benefits go into one account, I deal with everything. I have the same disability as my mum and whenever I get worried about money or about spending on something my husband makes it more than clear that my job of raising our daughter is much harder than his. Financial abuse is a very real thing. I would suggest that if he's being like this you come to an agreement on what you will get each month. Make him pay directly for anything extra but don't let him have so much control you feel bad for buying food whilst visiting a relative in hospital

I’m lost. You mean a mom who doesn’t work and gets support from a baby’s father?

F

My partner and I both get $1000 of spending money a month. We have a separate account for groceries and bills. You should sit down with your man and make a budget you can both agree upon.

@Christina🤱🏼🍂☕️♈️, I mean a SAHM in a relationship.

This question is going to be different for everyone and very relative to your specific financial situation. From my experience as a financial advisor couples seem to fall into 3 main categories. 1)a joint account that gets managed by both 2) separate accounts 3) the man handles everything & pays the woman an allowance. Every situation works well for different couples. The key is to be on the same page about it. Personally we have a different system that works great for us. We have a joint account for bills & groc.(needs) & separate accounts for us(Wants) All of our money goes into our joint account. All bills, Groc, medical ect. come out of the account. At the end of the month the money is divided & goes into 4 accounts, his, mine, savings, childs. When we want something we don't ask we just save up and use the money in our account. When we need something for our child we use the money in her account. As per your question I spend anywhere from 0-25 a week on us and we spend 100 on groc. & about 400 on bills.

@Kirstin, I'm sorry your mum went through that. That's awful. I'm glad your husband treats you in the way you deserve ❤️ I even feel guilty for asking for money for our sons therapy and my birth control.

Oh, so not married? I’m married so for me it’s less complicated. I just buy groceries as I need them. I get my hair or nails done when I want. Go to the doctors as needed.

@Deena, I only said a week or 2 because my situation is about the last 10 days. I was just after generalities, like as in on a normal week or normal fortnight, how much would you get or spend? In general, in 2 weeks, I'd spend around $600. My son has therapy twice a fortnight at $200 a session, plus groceries. Some weeks, it's more as we have a $500 car repayment, $140 phone bill, and my $160 health insurance, I'm refilling prescriptions, our cat sees the vet or in this case, I'm getting birth control.

We have a shared account which I use to pay for groceries, stuff for the kids etc. basically everything that is needed for the family. Most bills are paid from that account, as well. The amount I spend over two weeks depends on what we need to restock, but on average it’s about 300-400. On my separate account I transfer $200 a month, which is for my saving and my personal luxury spending. This means anything I want but don’t need I pay for from my personal account. If I would want to have more I could just tell my husband and he would let me increase the amount

@Christina🤱🏼🍂☕️♈️, why is it different because you're married? Also, how much would you say you spend a week?

Question: In addition; roughly how much do your partners earn, and do you have any of your own income? Mine earns six figures, and I have zero other income.

For myself like clothes or cosmetic procedures beauty products I would say I spend 100-200$ a month on average. That doesn’t include health insurance or what I buy for our daughter or phone bill because I think it’s our family expenses. I don’t really buy any drinks or food out of the house if I did I would spend more. Our financial situation is similar to yours, I don’t have any income myself. We have a lot of expenses like house mortgage, car payments etc, we don’t really need to save for food or our daughter at the moment but I guess it’s because we do t go to eat out, never take food out, I think that’s a big expense for many families, don’t do much shopping other than food and anything our growing daughter needs.

So I agree this is hard to answer because everyone has different circumstances. I’m a SAHM in the US, we only have a joint account. We don’t split bills or anything our one account pays for all bills and medical treatments. My son doesn’t haven’t regular doctors visits like it sounds like your child needs. We probably spend $1500-$1700 on groceries for the entire month. My son and I go to the chiropractor. He goes 1x month and it costs $40. I go every other week so $40 in a 2 week period there. Other than that we budget everything else together. So we have a restaurant budget and either one of us can use it to eat out, get coffee etc or go out on a date. We each have a spending budget that we can use on whatever we want. My son also has a monthly budget and that’s what we use to buy clothes, toys etc the “extras”. It sounds like you two need to come up with a budget. Obviously medical stuff is a category on its own and that can be hard to predict when procedures are needed.

My husband makes over 100k a year. I have no other income

Because being married, everything is joint typically. We always lived off of his income even prior to marriage. Mine was always extra into savings for vacations and date nights etc. I don’t work and have no income. We still live off of his income. I don’t spend weekly. I spend as needed. Some weeks I don’t spend anything 🤷🏼‍♀️

Wait I don’t understand? Your husband sends you money? You don’t have access to the bank accounts?

@Mara, see the money I spend is on appointments, medications, groceries, bills, etc I still have a very small amount of savings from when I worked. Stopped last September. I occasionally go out with friends, so I will pay to have dinner out, etc I rarely spend money on myself. The only money I'VE spent on myself from his money was to buy lunch and a drink for myself and on a separate occasion a drink when I went to visit my sister in hospital. I've also bought the t- shirts and socks.

@Caitlin, everyone's answer being different doesn't make it difficult to answer. It helps me get an idea of if I'm over spending and my partner is right to be frustrated. I think that's the crux of our issues, we don't budget together or have joint accounts for anything.

@Christina🤱🏼🍂☕️♈️, that varies between relationships. Before I stopped working, we would alternate who bought the groceries or split the cost, and I paid for our sons therapy, our phone bill, and we shared the car payments. I also paid for my own therapy and chiropractor appointments and my own health insurance, etc. Until December, I was also contributing to groceries, paying for our sons therapy, I paid for his $300 Paediatrician appointment, etc. I want to work and have e my own money again because I hate this.

@Nowy, I do not. They are his accounts. We had separate money because I was working until last September. He sends me money when I ask. I only really ask for appointments.

Sorry to hear that. All expenses for us always came from my husband. It’s just what worked for us. Good luck

@Adrianna, you don't know how much you spend in bills and groceries, etc, a week or fortnight? That's what I'm asking. I'm not asking about money you spend on yourself for clothes, makeup, outings, takeaway, etc I was hoping for a base amount. You sound like you have a good system and communication though, which is awesome.

@Adrianna same! Today I went out to the mall with my nieces and enjoyed a day in the arcade with them and then treated myself to a hoodie I liked. Supported a small business owner too so it was a win win!

“Overspending” is relative. Everyone has a different amount of income and expenses. Having a medical procedure is a one time expense vs typical weekly/monthly spending. It sounds like you two need to discuss a budget and come to an agreement around finances. If you aren’t working your savings will run out and then what? This isn’t meant to be rude, but seems like this will be a big issue in your marriage if you don’t discuss it and decide as a family what is best. Creating a budget can be hard at first especially if you guys haven’t done it before. We have categories for ourselves, our son, groceries, gas, restaurants, miscellaneous (something goes wrong on a car etc). Medical is whatever it is, we have an FSA we use for those expenses though so it doesn’t actually hit our budget.

You’re going to get vastly different answers depending on everyone’s income, cost of living, expenses, medical needs, etc. I don’t think you should base your lifestyle on what other people do 🤷‍♀️ Are you married? If so, have you thought of having a joint account? That’s what we do - there’s no “his money” and “my money,” it’s “our money.”

Also a lot of people don’t really think of expenses/bills in terms of a week or two, they think of them monthly. Because things like rent/mortgage, insurance premiums, car payments, subscription services, electricity, phone payments, etc. are typically billed once a month. I’d suggest sitting down with your partner and making a month budget that you both agree on.

We have separate houses, vehicles, bills, etc. 🤷‍♀️ We both have careers. Like some other responses mention, it’s tough because everyone’s situation is so vastly different. Bills on one hand fluctuate with seasonal stuff (utility usage), groceries and whatever the kids need.

@Caitlin, not rude. I have tried to discuss a budget, but it just doesn't happen. My savings basically have run out. My partner has been paying for everything since December. We owe my parents money for family holiday we went on in November for my Dad's 70th, we owe my brother and his wife money for a dinner they got catered that weekend as a gift to my Dad. I have a $7000 hex debt, and we have a $700 debt to do with childcare subsidy, and he got out a $17000 loan and I have no idea what happened to a chunk of it. The whole thing is a mess.

@Rebecca, getting different answers is the point of the post. I'm trying to work out if my partner is justified in being annoyed that he's transferred me $950 in the last 10 days.

@Ashley, are you a SAHM?

I was a sahm for 10 months & all our bills were in his name. He paid rent, I was getting unemployment bc of covid but that was 300 a week & he made 1k a week, rent was 1300 everything incl. But he also has a car payment, our phone bills, I get free Healthcare still & so does our daughter. If he's upset because he needs to pay bills I can understand. I didn't spend money we didn't have/ always apart of finances until I went back to work

I was a SAHM for 18 months and never got an allowance. We have a joint account where all bills etc came out of, and if I did need something I just bought it. I will say I was very conscious to keep my spending to an absolute minimum though, as I didn’t want to take the piss. I didn’t buy myself coffees or clothes or anything.

Yes I am a SAHM/WFH mom.

@Lauren, how was he able to afford rent that was more than he earned? That sounds impossible.

So at the time my husband made 1k after taxes weekly, thats 4k a month. Rent was $1300.00 a month everything- utility, gas, we didn't use a cable company just data from our phones for internet. Car plus insurance needed bc it is a pre owned dealership (not private sale) was 300 car, 85.00 insurance. His medical insurance through work was & still is 90 a month. Idk if you're in the US but back in lockdown I worked until lockdown & was very pregnant at the time March 2020. So I was given unemployment instantly 300.00 dollars a week, because I was home fulltime I also went to food pantries so we didn't spend much on grocery!! We also had WIC which is 70 dollars a month in fruit and vegetables, 5 gallons of milk, peanut butter, 2 loaves of bread etc. The list goes on but WIC is amazing, when I was done ebf they even covered all my daughters formula no cost. At the time we JUST made ends meet. The math was- 5200 after tax monthly income. Bills TOTAL mo/ 2700.00. I did NOT receive EBT

Also the US cracked down & before they did I hopped on to get a new job where I got free childcare bc cost of childcare my checks would have only covered daycare at the time. But if you do end up working even part time.. they may give you medicaid (free health) I also know even if you don't qualify for medicaid your child automatically being under 18 years old qualifies! No matter what.. so your child could have free health & free scripts etc.

I will say after working for DHHS myself, they try to help mothers get into work. There's workshops, there's free recruitment, I loved it. I could say yes or no from home to a job. Now we pay a rent to own small home so that's $2200 currently however including all our utility maybe 2300.00 lol 😆 I applied for Cars for Moms & have a beat car but it gets me to and from work & bc I work we both get taxes back. We are NOT married & I don't intend on marrying until 12 years when the US decides we are married by common law ❤️ this helps us remain independent, get more back in taxes annually.. I got 8k back for claiming our daughter & my spouse got 3k back so that takes care of both our cars inspection/ reg. & I paid our landlord 3 months advance so we can get ahead again

With all those expenses and debts, it sounds like you guys need more income to stay afloat. I would suggest either you get a job or he gets a second job. Unless there’s a significant way to reduce your expenses. But without knowing where you’re located, it’s hard for people to offer specific resources that could help (which vary wildly from country to country and state to state).

@Lauren, oh, that makes sense. I thought you meant $1,300pw. I'm not in the US. I don't qualify for any government assistance at the moment. Thank you though.

@Rebecca, we are ok for the moment. I'm not willingly a SAHM and am looking for a job.

Nothing, I earn my own money. However, when I was a SAHM with my ex he paid me via his business, but I was doing some admin for him