Not the most supportive partner…

I’m a bit fed up now and not actually sure how I haven’t internally exploded yet! My partner leaves home 5:30 and comes back 6:30 and runs to and from the station so I get he’s tired but I don’t really feel he pulls his weight enough with helping to look after baby. I do all the night wakes because I’m EBF but when I ask with some help at nights he says the nights are rubbish enough and doesn’t help at all. In fact he is still aiming for 100% sleep quality on his stupid fitness watch! When he gets home he’s says he’s too tired and will avoid taking baby properly (I have to force baby onto him), has a slow shower and makes sure he sits and has dinner slowly even if baby cries. When I ask him to take him for a bit he always moans saying I don’t know what his day is like. Weekends he goes for a run for an hour and a half every week and if I really push for it I maybe get an hour for me every 2-3 weeks. I get it’s good mental health and stuff but I’m starting to get annoyed - am I being unreasonable?!

Show your support

Umm no definitely not unreasonable !!! Have you talked to him about this? That’s a joke! When he’s not at work it should be 50/50. Even more so if he can’t help at night due to EBF. And trying to get 100% sleep quality when having a new baby, you’ve got to be joking !!

You are absolutely not being unreasonable. Can you ‘clock off’? if you’ve had a stressful tiring day, can you step back and take a seat? No. Being a mum is 24/7 and if he had any respect, he would understand that and stop moaning. All I can say is talk to him and communicate how you’re feeling and what your expectations are of him. Maybe suggest after his good night sleep on the weekend that he takes baby downstairs and you can have a lie in or watch tv for a few hours (I’m sure he can pop up if baby needs feeding). Maybe suggest he picks up more of the chores, cooking etc. hope you sort it x

Honestly could have wrote this myself, I’m in the exact same position. Message me if you need 🩷

On the weekend after his routine run, after you’ve fed and changed baby, give baby to him then go have a nap or go for a walk. Don’t say anything just get up and do it, let him figure it out. Come back after a couple of hours. He’ll soon see how much work you do.

I’m in the opposite position (I’m at work and husband is off with baby) and we always do 50/50 when I’m not working and if anything I probably do more. I’m knackered doing both so I do get it but my husband deserves to a break too like you x

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