Child being hurt at nursery by another child

I work in a preschool. You’d be surprised how normal this now is. There is not enough provision for children with SEND. Diagnosis takes years. Once they’re diagnosed you get little to no funding to support the child/children. And there are not enough spaces in special schools. At my school across early years (nursery, preschool, reception) there are currently 5 children who all need to be in a special school but unfortunately there are no spaces. As staff we do what we can to support these children and protect the nuerotypical children however sometimes you just can’t get there in time. As a parent it’s horrible as you don’t send your child there to get hurt so I can imagine how you’re feeling but as a member of early years staff I can’t begin to describe how difficult the job has become in the last couple of years.

That sounds really tough. It’s hard to see your child go through that, especially when it seems like the other child’s needs aren’t being met in a way that keeps everyone safe. Have you thought about discussing this with the nursery? They might have some ideas on how to handle the situation better. As someone who’s nephew is very much like this, it is hard on the parents of the child who is doing this and im sure they are trying everything to avoid this

I could have written this myself a few months ago. I had basically the same thing happen to my daughter, the boy hurting her was older and being assessed for autism. After the last time I asked for a meeting with the nursery manager. I completely understand they can’t have eyes everywhere and some incidents will happen when kids are so young. But I asked that the boy was kept away from her, especially as he has one member of staff assigned to him at all times. They’ve really made the effort and there hasn’t been an issue since (🤞🏻). I also felt that a mainstream nursery was not the place for this child but I appreciate there are limited other options available. Probably worth speaking to your nursery manager. Good luck!

I have been on both sides of this. My eldest used to the be child that got bitten all the time and that was horrible picking her up and worrying about how it would impact her. Now my youngest (on ASD pathway and non verbal) is the child that can bite and self harm (head bang so hard). I can honestly tell you it’s far worse having the child that bites. The constant fear of nursery saying she’s too much, parents waiting for you to have a go, and so on. There is rarely a day that goes by where I don’t cry with worry for her - she is mainly a happy child but once overwhelmed or frustrated, she’s gone. Our nursery do so well in looking after her and she does have 1 on 1 funding hours and an EHCP in process. There are quite a lot of other kids there that bite and aren’t sensory needs though. I might be worth speaking with the nursery and see what they can do to help. There is also no other nurseries, that I’m aware of, for SEN kids. Even the SEN schools don’t start until 5 x

My daughter has global delay due to brain cancer and chemo but she is the one getting bitten in school by another child. It is very common at this age as it is a way that children express themselves when frustrated and angry at times. That doesn't make it ok but it does happen. Speak to the nursery as the child should have staff to assist if they have additional needs x