Please ladies I am coming to you because my husband thinks I am crazy for wanting to divorce him, more to the story

He sounds abusive

Yes I agree he's abusive. And maybe he has unresolved childhood trauma that makes him treat his kids like that. Honestly I'd divorce him, and make him get help. And can't see the kids until he does. Anger causes harm to children. Physically, mentally and emotionally. I fell victim to angry parents and I REFUSE to have my child go thru what I did. HIM acting like that will hurt them in so many ways. Please protect them!

Sounds abusive and i think separation before divorce with family and individual counseling should happen before cutting all ties. There may be trauma thats leading his behaviors in this direction and you should give him that ultimatum. If he cant get the help he needs to be a better father and partner outside of just being your husband then no one wins in this situation. You need him to be a parent and you need him to be supportive no matter which way you turn (divorced or potential to work it out in the future)

@Courtney Cantillo I am a very protective mother, I actually moving to the sending floor so I am closer to the kids when he has them. My 8 year old tells me everything even the 4 year old. So I can addressed any situation. I have access to the backyard so yes, I will have them most of the time with me. I appreciate you commenting.. He has said he has changed, however I don’t care anymore, I want out.

The scary part Is them kids will be alone with him on his visitation days/times. This needs addressing before that point. One thing you will need is evidence of abuse which you probably can't get without leaving them at risk of him (which I'm not advising) Start off by telling him to go on anger management or even to his G.p for help as he clearly needs it.

I am actually shocked that you stayed around as long as you did

@Love I wanted to leave, but there were also good time and I felt sorry for my kids and my ex.. I was emotionally and financially attached , it has been close to a month that I told him and I have been feeling incredibly free, happier, however still pains me to tell my kids, we are all still living together and waiting to move out..

@Love and let me tell you, that now, he keeps asking why so much hate towards him, I am not sure if he is like that or he really has a problem that does forget about everything, He does not even questions how he made feel or what he did to me, his brain is so little that I don’t think can’t think more than that, he asked me, what about forgiveness? Why can’t I not forgive him?. He might got better these couple months but does not guarantee me that he will an awesome husband for the rest of our lives.

I feel like men just do that s*** to kind of not feel as bad for the things they did to us. I was just ignore and do what you got to do to get out that situation. Your children will understand later I'm sure you don't want them to see you as a unhappy mother, do you?

This is a pretty common dynamic.. Men don’t understand that if they don’t create a safe space for their woman that woman will live in fear and eventually leave that environment. Us women have a fear in us already created by men history of abusing women so we automatically will distrust if men start to yell scream etc

@Luz exactly. I forgave him many times throughout our marriage, and not until last year I told him, I was not happy, he tried to improve but not as how I expected, until today that I decided to say, SORRY THIS MIGHT HURT YOU, but I can’t do it anymore. Now they play the victim that he is trying, too late buddy, years I have been telling you to bring peace into the relationship, ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. I am prioritizing myself this time, THANK YOY I sometimes doubt myself about my decision but I did the right one. 🥹☺️

It's so hard sometimes to quantify abuse when it's not physical, I questioned myself repeatedly, I was made to believe it was a "normal" part of marriage and alarm bells were ringing but I disregarded them and one day I said no it's not right, I refuse to live like this another day else i'll end up sectioned/committed. Don't be forced to stay in toxic relationships, do not allow external voices lead you away from what your mind and heart are screaming at you. It's not normal and you deserve better. Noone should feel like a prisoner in their own home