Pregnant

So me and my husband split over a year but we are still friends and talk for the sake of our children, I went through a really bad time and me and him slept together. Few weeks later I found out I was pregnant ( doctors told me I couldn't get pregnant and it's been 14yrs) But I'm kinda scared what to do, he wants to be involved in babies life and even wants to be at the birth but I don't know if to let him or not, it would be nice as he's never seen any of our children be born and it's a once in a lifetime opportunity, but what would you think? He split because it was a toxic relationship together but since separation were better as friends, he's always there for me and helps us out etc..
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If you think you'll be genuinely supported by him through the birth and you're comfortable with it then I don't see why he couldn't be there for the birth. From what you've said it's sounds like you've been making the best of a crappy situation together and are being mature adults, so as long as you're comfortable and supported, it sounds like it could be really good for the both of you to have him present. But of course it's completely your decision mama and you're allowed to change your mind as well. Good luck 🫶🏼 xx

@Mollie he is involved and I didn't expect to get pregnant, he has his own new parent now and I don't want him to think just because we're having a new baby together that we can get back together because I left because it was toxic, I don't agree with everything he says but I do not hate him either, I just want us both to be apart of our children's lives, my girls love him dearly more so than me tbh x

I wasn’t with my youngest son’s father when I found out I was pregnant and I let him be at the birth and he’s a very involved father. I’d also not had a child in 14 years

I wasn't with my sons father during my pregnancy or anytime after. Very toxic and abusive relationship so I fled 2 months pregnant. I had his mother and sister messaging me telling me mid covid pandemic that her son would see the birth of his child as it was his right and he'd be in full PPE if it had to be. I made sure the hospital and nurses kept it quiet he was to be escorted off the grounds if he turned up. He wasn't even to be told I was at that hospital. Birth is your moment only you can do it. You have to decide what you're going to look back and and think either that was a great experience I felt supported XYZ or it will be I was terrified and traumatised the whole time. I couldn't relax and settle I felt unsafe. The second feelings were mine and I'm 1 and done. I can never out myself through thst experience again no matter how good anyone promises to be to me. Its a scar I carry for life. You have to make you happy. He doesn't get rights to make you uncomfortable or unhappy in your birthing time

@Sophie I understand and I'm sorry you went through that, yes my husband was very toxic controlling maniuplating etc that's why I left but he still feels as if he is entitled to me, we get on a lot better since splitting a year ago but he keeps saying he wants to be apart of birth, iv never been in this situation so I don't know what's best.. I don't want to go through it alone giving birth but I also don't want him there if that makes sence

Regardless of how your relationship was, if you’re on better terms now, you should let him be there.

Why don’t you want him there? What do you think is the worst that could happen?

@Ragine he's very toxic so I'm not able for the drama whilst giving birth a possibility that could happen

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