Libido and parenthood

it’ll pass, it did with me. i never had a high libido anyway before pregnancy, then we didn’t have sex for the whole of my pregnancy with my first. then we waited until i was 6 weeks pp to have sex (going by the guidance) and it felt better than ever. my sex drive still wasn’t high, but i suffer from vaginal dryness and it’s like my pregnancy fixed my vagina (although the dryness is now back this pregnancy ha). i was always too exhausted or too tired, made every excuse under the sun. but then i read something somewhere that made me realise its not always about me, and i need to ensure my partner is satisfied too. i started pushing myself to have sex more, initiate more etc. once im in the moment & having sex, i enjoy it, but its before the sex that i found hard to push past. but our sex life has gotten better, we feel more connected more intimate and it takes the stresses of parenthood away. you’ll get there soon mama ❤️

I was super horny at the beginning of.. then lost all interest during the middle… now in the 3rd trimester it has come back with a vengeance!! I took a nap this morning, and all I could dream were the different positions I like! 😅 Was getting it good when my alarm woke me up! 😩 Reached for the vibrator next to me. 🤭

I could have wrote this myself. I have really been struggling with this as well. My husband really wants it, but I do not. My LO is 4 months. We have had sex a handful of times and I’ve just done it to appease him and that makes it even worse I think. I feel exactly the way you do about it being weird with my daughter in the other room. I feel unattractive, I’m so dry, it hurts a little, and it just doesn’t really feel good. I hope that my libido goes up at some point. I’ve been researching this topic and trying to find ways to help it, but 1. it’s so normal 2. it’s just going to take time and patience and maybe some exploration of ways to boost it naturally (I’m reading smut 😂). Also I do not want there to even be the tiniest, slightest chance of getting pregnant again for a long time. My husband knows this and he is somewhat understanding, but he’s a man lol.

I was this way until I got back on Wellbutrin. Libido came back almost immediately

Yes, I had interest again from around 10 months pp but my libido didn't fully return until 20 months pp when my cycle returned (breastfeeding). So I think a lot of it with me is hormonal but I think caring for a baby and everything that comes with it are valid reasons too- sex is just not a priority anymore. I've since had another baby and had little interest during pregnancy, this baby is 2 months now and I have absolutely no interest. My partner would want to but is understanding and knows this is a phase in our life and relationship that will pass.

I personally haven’t seen a difference and we’ve done it 3/4 times a week since 6 weeks pp and baby is currently 5months old. To be fair we wait until she’s sleeping or napping and it feels fine to do. I feel like the more you do it the more it will feel normal to leave her to have sex It’s totally okay to feel the way you are but remember nothing should happen to baby whilst you do it as long as she’s kept in a safe space.