PLEASE GIVE ME ADVICE !!

Me and my partner are first time parents i just recently got off of maternity leave was out for 4 months. First day was the 11th and her dad watched her i work four days and he only watches her 2 days out of them 4. However this was his first time actually watching her without me . He explained to me that she cries nonstop and doesn’t want to go to sleep when she’s with him , he explained that he gets frustrated sometimes. We than talked about it told him it’s ok because we are new to this so it takes time . Fast forward to today I’m at work again and i get a text stating that he got her to sleep but 20 min later says she’s up and sends me not 1 but 3 videos of her on the bed crying with this text following l “N she won’t fucking gooooo to sleep. She dead assss ohdeeeing she dead ass making me wanna hit her “ “She only fucking do this shit when it’s me n her she won’t sleep longer then 15 min i do every fucking thing but for everyone else she wanna behave im done im not watching her im really ready to punch n i dont like this feeling “Im dead ass not watching her tomorrow so call out idc what you gotta do im not I promise idc”. Im literally holding back tears typing this because I’m hurt, scared , and angry and i feel bad for my baby because she doesn’t know better she is 4 months that’s the only way she can communicate and tell us when something is wrong. Being scared to leave my baby with her dad/ my man is something i never thought would happen. I just don’t know what to do I’m scared and i don’t want nothing happening to my baby i would lose it . I’m thinking about putting her in daycare i really just wanted her to be alil bigger. I don’t know , if anyone went through this please give me advice Or have any suggestions

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I’m sorry you’re going thru this:( would u ever be interested in a work from home job? That’s what I ended up doing. I wanted to be home with my baby while working. It’s relieved a lot of anxiety off of my shoulders

He just needs to breathe. One step at a time. They should do skin to skin if all her other needs are met it works wonders. Her hearing his heartbeat could help calm down. But he needs to take a lot of deep breaths if it gets to much walk away and take a couple minutes to calm back down. Baby cries can be overstimulating. If your scared he is going to do something to her please find someone to watch her but if it’s overwhelming and he just needed to vent to let his frustration and feelings out you are his person he would share his feelings with. I recommend talking it out when u get home and maybe go through all the things u would do in that situation 💗 I hope this helps

I think u should listen to what he’s saying & prevent anything bad from happening to your baby! Like u said she doesn’t understand at all. Maybe consider a family member or daycare.

@Maddy that’s what I’m going to have to look for. I tried looking up some but it’s hard to point out which ones are legit.

If you have been doing all the childcare baby and dad still need to bond and learn each other’s cues. However, dad does not seem capable at the moment. I would look for a different childcare situation. It’s totally fine to need to take a breath and step away. Personally I had to go take a shower to calm myself down at least once, but I don’t like that his first reaction is to threaten violence. Baby cannot self regulate and needs a regulated caregiver to help them calm down.

baby is with my cousin right now . It’s just when will they ever get the time to bond if he can’t watch her while I’m at work.

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