During sex does your partner ask you if it feels nice or if it is painful?

Do you give him feedback? Or take the lead yourself? If it doesn't feel good then change it up. It shouldn't hurt!

I'd say something don't just lay there and take it cuz he won't know and you'll start to hate him

He doesn’t have to because I let him know. He often lets me set the pace and then takes the lead once we’ve established a good rhythm.

I feel like it’s my responsibility to give feedback or tell him what I want him to do instead!

Nah I guide and give feedback. If he’s got the right spot I tell him to keep going coz I’m close, if he’s going too hard or hurting or whatever I tell him. Communication goes a long way!

You can make giving feedback and communicating sexy and not awkward. “I love that, keep doing that, etc.” before hand have a talk about what you like and ask him to do more of it. “I love when you do xyz position; let’s switch so I can show you how much I enjoy it.” You can have a code word for painful, or switch positions so it doesn’t throw off the mood.

We’ve been together for so long, he knows what he’s doing/what I like. Really no need to check up lol unless we’re trying something brand new, to which then yes he will. But if something did happen like he accidently hurt me or I just wanted to ask something be done, I’m vocal-not the type to just lay there and have something done to me that I don’t care for. I wouldn’t wait for him to ask if that makes sense. But I feel like that takes a certain level of comfort in a relationship.

I mean he doesn’t check in but I have nasty joint issues so I’m very vocal if something hurts I don’t just wait for him to ask though

My partner will only ask if it feels good or not when I’m not being vocal. We typically communicate quite a bit during sex though so he rarely has to ask. If something doesn’t feel right for me, I just say so. Or I just say I want to try something else/ a different position. Women’s bodies are much more complex than men’s bodies, they don’t know what the hell it feels like for us. If basic communication during sex ruins the mood, there’s probably something wrong in the relationship. Sex should be enjoyable for both parties- and it should be enjoyable to please one another. In other words, he should want your feedback to give you a good experience.

Learning to communicate before, during and after sex will make the whole experience so much better. Let him know before that you want him to check in with you, while you’re doing it give him feedback so he can make it feel good for you.

Thanks Ladies, your right I need to guide better and commucate if I like it or don't. I don't have much experience in sex so lack confidence in that area.