Bd gf meeting baby

It’s not unreasonable for you to want to be there the first time. You would vet a babysitter or childminder and it’s common decency to at least do introductions for safeguarding, but unfortunately everyone has to agree to as it’s not something you can demand. So sorry you have to navigate this!

Its really not the big deal that other women would have u believe it is. My kids met their dad's new partner (now wife) within a year, she's great with them! They know I'm their mum, so it's not like anything is taken away from me

I just want me and her to get along we both haven’t done anything wrong to each other but he just wants to keep us separate. I’ve messaged her and hoping she’ll talk to me but not sure if he’ll try control the situation and stop her

@Rebecca this is reassuring I think you just think the worst and as she’s a baby and can’t speak I can’t even ask her 🤣

If I personally haven’t met the woman she’s not laying a finger on my child. I’m sure he’s gonna want her to change a diaper or feed her… I wouldn’t let a stranger do those things so therefore I would be present

@Sophia yeah it’s hard I’m waiting to speak to her to set some boundaries but whether they do them when I’m not there is another thing! He only has he one night every two weeks because she stopped him coming to mine to see her and coz of work he can only commit to one day x

She stopped him coming to your home to see his own baby because??? What was her reason? That alone says to me this is not a mature person and if she’s acting that pathetic over a BABY when she knew he had a kid when he met her, what’s to say she doesn’t turn spiteful and does some evil shit to your baby? Nope. Also why does he get to dictate now all of a sudden? Why did he backtrack from waiting until your child was 1? You are also the parent, you have as much a say as he does. Of course you’re going to be there for the first time they meet. It’s your baby FFS, not a toy! You would vet anyone else looking after your child, to not do so would be irresponsible. If he tries to start some shit, go down the legal route. If he had any sense he would see this is about the safety of your child. You’re not doing this to be petty, you’re doing it to make sure she isn’t some psycho child abuser. Any normal co-parent would understand that.

@Neena yeah weird part is when I’ve rang her normally in a rage because of him she’s been fine so hopefully we can get along but I have called her out on stopping him and she just said I tell him what I’m uncomfortable with it’s his decision not to which is true it’s all on him he should choose his daughter and tell her no but he doesn’t! Xx

I understand both sides, did he try to work something else out with you besides just one day? She does sound immature/ possibly toxic. I’d be afraid that she’s be mean to my lo

@Sophia no he did we agreed tue thur and say he would see her and then he just didn’t show tup through the week or explain it obviously I knew why. It’s hard because she does seem nice and she’s a nurse so has a good job/ deal with patients so hoping this reflects on how she trests my daughter it’s just the co parenting I’m struggling with it’s like they want me to disappear xx

I completely get that, I understand your hoping for the best when it comes to her! I know there not married but do you think it would be easier for everyone if you communicated with them both, like a gc or her directly? She might feel seen and respected more?(not saying your disrespectful at all) I’d try that, giving respect to her might open her up to giving you more and a better relationship might spark? (I could just be crazy🙃 I’m trying to be creative)

@Sophia yeah I’m going to try speak to her and try build a weird sorta friendship and go from there and if she doesn’t want to then there’s not much more I can do! Thank for your help though xx

Been thru this and I’m with neena Him not wanting you guys to talk is a big red flag . My child’s father did this and it seems like he did it to keep the lies between us . But it sounds like you’re saying she’s nice so it may just be him on his part. If they’re willing to talk, I would ask him why honestly . In front of her and everything.

Tell him to do 1 !! X

@K.M Hahahha I would love to tbh but looks like I just need to get on with it