Can relationships make you depressed?
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@Kellie wow sorry your friend went through that and I’m glad she nipped it in the bud early. I think the less time with someone the easier it is. I’ve asked him for space, I’ve told him we need to go our separate ways etc.. he just takes no notice or says I’m not getting into it with you right now and dismisses everything I say, there’s no understanding, no resolve and for the past 1 year it’s just getting worse. I’ve put up with so much in 5 years , but it’s really impacting my mental health. He’s emotionally unsolved, makes no effort, doesn’t make me feel good about myself. And never approaches me to try n make things right or better. He helps a lot with the kids when I’m working 12 hour shifts which could be day or night and I’d have to leave my job… as dunno if he would still help. Only last 2 kids are his. I just feel trapped n fed up. He’s currently downstairs on game, and I’m upstairs and we had it out today on phone, yet I’ve been quiet all evening n there’s just no concern.
@Kellie I’ve expressed multiple times the same things over n over, and I just think he used me at this point, and he’s happy to treat me like I’m nothing at this point. I haven’t had sex with him in 4 weeks, which he’s mentioned. But why would I , he don’t take me out, barely speaks to me, I initiate most deep conversations, I dress up with friends, barely tells me I look nice, no date night scince last year July. I just never feel good 😊. I’ve stopped giving all my energy into him as he when I do he’s ungrateful. He’s done some real shitty things n all I get told is, it’s the past. Just dismissed everytime.
It’s better to be separate, thriving and single and coparenting than be w someone and be miserable. My friend just got out of a newish relationship of only 6m but in that 6m she can see so many red flags and he was so insecure and jealous that he’d managed to isolate her from her friends in only 6m. Last time we attended a gfs bday together and legit her partner drove her there AND waited for her in the car so after the dinner finished she didn’t come clubbing w us and left early “because her partner was waiting” 😵💫 I’m glad she was able to escape from that now she’s happy and free to do whatever she wants. (We had a girls catch-up last night and she announced she isn’t w him anymore) But yeah sometimes it’s better to be single, healing, growing thriving and working on yourself than being depressed w a person who brings no value to your life. And you might meet a dude naturally, just like my mum did, she’s found love again too. After 2 miserable decades w my Dad. W 4 (adult) kids.