I need some input y’all! Please tell me if I’m wrong because I really don’t know any better.

Can the whole group just split the $50?

@Brittany right! That’s what I was also thinking.

I think all the bridesmaids should split it

Send a group text out and ask. If they all want to participate it won’t hurt to split it.

@Brittany okay, so do you think I should just ask them directly and not involve my cousin at all?

I wouldn’t!! For my bachelorette party I had no part of the planning process. All the girls just handled things on their own. I think it’s pretty common.

For my friends Bachelorette festivities we (as her friends)split everything. We split the house, winery, boat, & groceries. She didn't pay for anything

like brittany said.. it’s literally $50 i’m sure it can be split if not then no winery 🤷🏻‍♀️

I still resent my maid of honor for literally doing nothing. Does she need to pay for the whole group no, but does she need to be able to reserve things and book things yes. I wish she had just told me no to being my maid of honor and I had someone that really supported me and was present. It’s okay to bow out if you’ve got too much and can’t commit. I had to do that with my best friend because I just wasn’t at the right place in my life to be able to do what she needed.

I totally get that. And I’m sorry that happened to you. I’ve never been anyone’s made of honor so I genuinely did not know what all of this consisted of a few months ago. But yeah, because I literally just bought my dress as well. Which was an extra expense I couldn’t afford right now.

I was in a similar position when I was pregnant. What I did was cover the cost of the reservation and calculated that into the cost of hosting(I allowed all the ladies to stay in our home the whole weekend) so basically everyone was fine chipping in for all the costs of us hosting so everyone paid their way including the bride. The days of brides trips, and bachelorette parties being free are over yall. Not in this economy 😂😂😂

Do a group text and say you need everyone’s portion by x date. Five days before that date send a private reminder text to each person who hasn’t paid while also nicely mentioning that you don’t have time to send out individual text reminders in the future. Three days before send a reminder text tagging whomever hasn’t paid in the group text saying that if their cut hasn’t come in they won’t be able to join because you can’t cover that many people and the winery needs the full balance. The day before the deadline, send a final reminder in the group text, saying it’s the last day and then remove them from the party if they haven’t paid the next day. You gave them plenty of reminders and notice that are provable so no one could be upset with you for them not. I had to do this for a $1000 deposit on a bachelorette sunset cruise last month. People were pretty quick to pay after being @‘d.

The bridal party should split the costs. All group + bride’s costs should be handled by the bridal party unless the bride insists on paying. Individual costs should be the responsibility of each individual but the group should cover the bride. That’s how most people do it. Alternately decline the position if it’s too much of a commitment for you financially or otherwise. That’ll probably be best for everyone in the long run.

No she should not be covering the deposit. I think you should ask the whole group to split the fee. And just keep in mind, there are costs associated with being in someone’s wedding. It is very likely you will have to pay for something’s yourself. If it’s not something you can do financially it’s ok to back out or say no to being in the wedding. I think a real friend or family member would understand.

Ask the group for the deposit and I assume it discounts the end price.

I definitely agree with the above that you should contact the party to split the deposit. Honestly if you're booking anything you should get the full cost upfront from each guest, if people decide not to come last minute you don't want to end up in a situation where you're trying to work out who foots that bill. Give a date and a total price for the event and a deadline for payment. Maybe deposit within a week and full balance within 2 months, and leave the option for people to contact you privately if they want a bit more time to pay and organise that separately! That said I will note that maybe you're not thinking the right way about the money your finance earns. You are a stay at home mum, you're supporting his career and he's supporting you(and your child) financially. I think you should be able to feel comfortable asking for the money(assuming there is enough money) regardless of whether it's his event or not. If he wouldn't think twice about spending that amount on an event neither should you 🥰

I agree with all of the above. She should not be paying and it should be split between everyone. That being said, if you can’t afford to be the maid of honor, that’s ok too. It’s a commitment. AND you should ask your partner to front the money because it should be your money too. Or you should both be splitting the cost of daycare and you have a job. It’s not fair to operate like that.

Everyone needs to PayPal or venmo you for their portion, and then you pay since you’re the one booking

The bridesmaids should split the costs of the bachelorette including the brides share