Save the relationship

For me, I really had to heal all my trauma first. There was a lot. So I sat down with my therapist and went through it all one by one. And slowly I didn't get triggered by my husband anymore. We went from arguing every week to barely ever arguing. The first year of working on myself was hard but now when I go to therapy I don't even know what to work on anymore. It's a great feeling knowing you've worked through your shit and don't feel like it's controlling you every day

@Susie it’s so hard. I feel like I am drowning

I completely understand. I had a suicide attempt not long into our marriage because I felt so stuck. But I'm here to tell you it can and will get better. Therapy is hard work but once you find someone you're comfortable with and who's professional it'll get better slowly. Just takes perseverance to get there. And it will show in your relationship. We went from me not being able to look at him to me being in love with him all over again. It's possible, don't lose hope if you want to get better and improve your relationship. And counseling together can also help, it helped us get better at working through our problems. My husband's even had a few sessions by himself which was probably hard for him because he doesn't open up easily. So maybe your partner can see if something bugs or triggers him and work through that by himself too.

Thanks. I am so glad you stuck around ❤️ yeah we stared going together and I am going back by myself. I also think he needs to work through some stuff. We just get in this rut where he gets hurt and gives me the silent treatment with what it feels like no end to it and it is so hard.

I'm sure you get there. Just focus on yourself if he's giving you the silent treatment. And after a good session tell him about it and communicate communicate communicate when y'all are in a good place.

Thanks so much for responding