Relationship issues with ADHD and more

I have a long chaotic post that I need advice on so I’m apologizing now if it doesn’t make any sense ! I’m looking for advice and wondering if anyone else can relate. I have ADHD and can’t get medicated until after my pregnancy and breastfeeding are done. Lately, it feels like my ADHD combined with pregnancy hormones and past relationship struggles, is making things really hard between me and my partner. We’ve been through a lot together. In the past, we broke up, and during that time, he ended up messing around with someone who was a close friend of ours. What made it even harder was that she was living in the same house as me at the time. It left me with so much trauma and pain because she was like family to me and we were best friends at the time and I’ve never really healed from that. Eventually, we worked things out and got back together, but I still carry those scars, and my ADHD makes it hard for me to process or express everything I’m feeling. (I also have a problem with jealousy) Now we’re expecting our second child, and my sex drive is non-existent. It’s been really affecting our relationship because we used to be very sexual with each other. I feel guilty, and I know he’s frustrated, even though he says he tries to understand. On top of that, my ADHD makes communication so difficult. I get distracted easily, forget parts of conversations, or cut him off when I’m trying to say something because I’m scared I’ll forget it. Other times, I just don’t respond at all because I don’t want to interrupt him, and by the time he’s done, I’ve forgotten what I wanted to say. This makes him feel like I’m not listening, which leads to arguments. When I try to explain how I feel, he sometimes says, “I didn’t make you feel that way,” or “that’s not how I made you feel” and it shuts me down because I feel like I’m not allowed to express my emotions. I feel like I’m failing as a girlfriend, especially because my ADHD and hormones are so out of control right now. Has anyone been in a similar situation? How do you navigate communication struggles with your partner, especially when ADHD, trauma, and pregnancy are all in the mix? Any advice or shared experiences would mean so much to me. Thanks for listening to my rant 🙂 p.s. I feel like my life with this all is like a drama show but I’m willing to talk about it all I just can’t find the words to write it all and doubt all of you want to read a novel 😂 plus my adhd makes me not tell it all in chronological order 😞