Narcissistic Exes… me AND my besties

I’d like to think of myself as a strong independent woman lol and similarly I think my homegirls are the same one I’ve known since I was 11 and the other one since I was 14 and I’m 32 All of us in a very staggered timeline realized that our exhusbands were raggedy pieces of shit But one of my friends (most recent turbulent relationship) discovered her husband has a narcissistic personality and she described all of the traits that led to that professional diagnosis… and she described my exhusband and my other homegirls exhusband to a TEEEEEEE with very specific examples And we were just talking about how crazy it was that we all had this very shared echoed experience and like wtf how and why? 🤣 and like i totally blamed myself in the beginning for getting myself into that scenario and being blind to “the signs” but I also think that’s why I put so much blame on myself because how am I so strong and independent yet I fell into this shit hole…. Hmmm I’m actually going to bring this thought up to my therapist tomorrow lol but I know I’m not the only one that this had happened to

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It's almost like society produces this particular type of man... and tells women to blame themselves for men's bad behavior... like there's a bigger problem here than you or your friends' personal histories... Nah, that would be crazy... right? 🧐

I mean...everyone has traits of a personality disorder but some are 100% to the T, narcissists. They're attracted to women who are very caring and independent. I had an ex who fits narcissism and was a pedophile. He broke me down to the point where I had nothing left. Kept getting cheated on and lied to. Then, one day we were on the beach and he said something about these little girls. I won't say it on here but I was shocked and disgusted. That was my breaking point. Thank God I left him and were never married. He's now married and has 2 young daughters. I tried warning her but she ended up blocking me. He was a sick and twisted fuck. I'm now happily married to a man who isn't perfect but is very caring, normal, noble, and dedicated family man.

@Bonny right and I don’t blame myself anymore but as I was leaving my relationship I did feel a lot of blame and guilt And that’s what I was telling my homegirl that it might feel like your fault you need somewhere to place blame but it’s not you can’t blame yourself when you were tricked

@Roya yes and the break down was crazy but I remember him telling me one day that I wouldn’t find anyone better than him and a light switch went off in my head Like girl this man has his back against a wall and is trying to trap you After we split up his behavior got progressively worse and actually started putting hands on his new gf I was so miserable before I left and I’m so grateful I didn’t stick it out for the sake of time

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