Going through pregnancy with lack of mother

I feel you. I didn’t not cut her off yet, but every time I talk to her I feel hurt and I wonder why do I keep doing this to myself. It sucks.

Yes. I wish I could cut her out completely. She texted me twice in my pregnancy and had met my son a handful of times throughout the holidays (he is now 6m). She doesn’t call to see how we are doing, doesn’t drop off food or toys, doesn’t offer to watch him so I can shower, doesn’t help clean, doesn’t want to spend any time with me or him. It’s disgusting. And it was so hard when I was pregnant. I yelled at her so much. She swore she would do better and she’d be around, in it for the long run. Well now the novelty of a grandson has worn off and so has her love. We are back at square one.

Im sorry you had to go through that ❤️ I called her for advice on how to deal with morning sickness and she told me “healthy women don’t get morning sickness, I didn’t have it” and then it was basically “oh you’re a woman just deal with it”. And then they call and ask me to help them with things, basically solve their problems. After I told them how sick I every every awake hour of my day. Also they things they want me to do can only be done during working hours, like I’m supposed to somehow just handle their problems instead of working? And then work after work to make up? All while being sick? It’s just meh

@Margaret my mom called me the day of my best friends wedding in a different city, I was the MOH, to borrow $7K for a car that she hadn’t looked at, researched or found. It was also -25 degrees in the dead of February. Like cool mom, I’ll ditch the wedding to return home for you and this car you supposedly need. Whenever her car breaks down she just assumes she can use mine. Though I work out of town and need to carpool. Her work is 7 minutes from her house and a bus goes there. Or you know, Uber/taxi. It’s okay for me to bother my colleague and make my husband take our big gas eating truck to work 2 hours away. Just because she can’t be inconvenienced for her own problems. I’ve said it many times, I am my parents parent. And it’s exhausting. And now that I have young children, I can’t be taking care of them the same way anymore. At what age do they grow up?

They never will 💔

I haven’t cut off my mom but and she did buy me so many things during pregnancy like all the nursery furniture but I wouldn’t say we have a good bond. She was (stupidly) the first person I called when I found out I was pregnant and I was freaking out because it was unplanned and she basically just yelled at me. Ever since she’s talked crap about me to everyone about how I just couldn’t keep my legs closed (literally was married before I got pregnant) and all this stuff. She was physically and emotionally abusive my whole life and is all around a pretty mean spirited person so we try to keep our distance. I lean a lot on my MIL. Do you have a MIL or maybe a SIL or an aunt you can reach out to?