Failing my babies by myself.

I don’t know exactly how to explain what I am currently thinking right now. as I lay in bed with my two babies 14 months and 3 months. I can’t help to think I could have done things differently for them. Me and their dad are not together and since they’ve been born it is has on and off with us. It today has came to an end. I do everything for these two since they’ve been born as he was working away so I’ve always done it alone. I sit here and now think that they are not going to have the family life a lot of others will have, i know it sometimes is better without and I won’t see them go without in other ways. I just feel they won’t get to have what they should have. It is my decision this too. I feel it falls on me so it is my choice. but I feel it is right for ME, is that selfish as I’ve got two little humans who wont be seeing him much ( few times a year now ) and the healthiest option. Although I know the time will come when they ask why their dad isn’t here and it will be on my shoulders knowing it was me that cut it off. I don’t know what type of responses I’m looking for but is anyone else been in this situation and even had questions about their dad not being in the picture. i really don’t know how to explain this.
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Listen you got this. What’s happened in the past we move forward from there’s no way to change it but you can change the future you can carve out a beautiful life for all three of you. My mom was a single mother with me and my sister. She worked her ass off to give us anything and everything she built us from the ground up. You’re capable of doing this if you want that life. It is not selfish they won’t be seeing him you show up so they notice who doesn’t. They are very lucky for you to be their mom don’t forget that.

I don’t have experience being the mom in this situation, but I grew up with my mom and dad not being together. They split when I was 3 months old and I saw my dad maybe once a month it’s wasn’t really that hard for me since I never knew any different. And for the last few years I’ve talked to my dad more than I’ve spoken to my mom. I guess what I’m trying to say is that if you guys split while they are so young then they won’t know anything is different or strange yeah they will have questions in the future my mom was honest with my brother and I and just told us straight up why they weren’t together. But everyone is different. Keep your head up momma do what is best for you and your mental health. If you are happy and healthy then your babies will be happy and healthy.

@Gianna this just made me cry. Thankyou so much for taking the time to write this.

@Kyla this makes a lot of sense. thankyou for the comment❤️

When my 6year old was 5months old I broke off the relationship with his dad, this was due to alot of reasons and the nail in the coffin was he told me he was working and went on a date with someone that's nearly twice his age.... but my son has never asked why he doesn't live her with us but my 15month olds dad does I knew it was the best option for my little boy as otherwise I wouldn't of been happy which then he wouldn't of been happy I've never stopped him seeing him either and he sees him a few times a year but my boy is happy thankfully

I hope this opened your eyes to realize you’re enough with and without a man and so are your girls

I agree with Gianna, but as living proof, one day when you are in a better place and ready to open your heart again to someone you’ll meet a wonderful person who will love you and your girls as their own and you’ll realize why it didn’t work out in the first place. 

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