Don’t know what to do - best friend

I’ve been best friends with this woman for over 10 years, I was MOH for her wedding less than 6 months ago. She’s been trying for a baby for a long time without success but does already have a child who’s now a teenager. I found out I was pregnant in January and obvs I wanted to tell my best friend straight away but knowing what’s she’s going through I worded the message several times to ensure I wasn’t being insensitive in anyway etc. Her response was she’s happy for me but 3 days later messaged me to say she’s struggling with our friendship and blamed it over the fact I barely messaged her over Christmas. We’ve barely spoken since and I’m finding it really hard not having her in my life! Should I message her or accept it’s done?

Show your support

Message her

What should I say? Sorry I’m worried it will back fire

Just apologise if that is factual, make a conscious effort, even if she doesn't want to speak still check in regularly. It could be a cover for her feeling of disappointment or maybe not!

She's lying, it's definitely not about Christmas IMO, but she doesn't want to be truthful with you as she knows it's unreasonable and unfair. I'd definitely message her

I wouldn't apologize bc you don't really have anything to apologize for. I'd try to figure out what she is really upset about and if yiu can make it better you know ? Bc I doubt it has anything to do with christmas. She's prolly just feeling upset bc she hasn't been able to have a baby. Which I can 100 percent understand. But she prolly just needs you to push and make her let you in, and give her the support she probably needs? Idk if that makes sense but that my opinion

Oh man, this is rough. Because on the one hand it's possible your were MIA? But then she should have reached out if she felt you were kind of absent. I don't feel that it's fair for her to suddenly tell you this, after you shared your news. To me, it feels like a way for her to take space from you and make it your fault since you were MIA on her a few months back... so that when she's MIA on your after your shared the news it won't be obvious that it's because she's struggling and I honestly think that's what it is. If she's my best friend I'd let her know that if she felt I was MIA I wish she communicated that to me. Holidays get busy and I would have been more aware of my lack of effort if she had communicated that I was slacking in our friendship. I would also say that it hurts to suddenly hear that after I've shared my exciting news and that I had hoped as my best friend we could share in the joy for me. Either way, it seems tha5 she needs space and i want to respect that but to know that when she's

2. (Continuation) ready to talk to me, I'm here. I'm really sorry :(

Thank you everyone! I totally understand where you all are coming from and I 100% apologised till I was blue in the face about not messaging her but your right, she never messaged me over Christmas too and looking back I was messaging in our group chat anyways, it was literally not a message to her directly. I will message her and hopefully things sort themselves out because the stress isn’t good for me or baby xx

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