You’re right, she can’t understand when she hasn’t done it herself. So she should keep her thoughts to herself since she has no place to comment. What a weird thing to think when a baby is just being a baby. People see a snippet of your day and really think they know everything about your parenting 🙄 I hope your husband has got your back. Enjoy the closeness of your baby, I miss my baby’s cluster feeds ❤️
You're doing what your baby needs and that's all that matters ❤️ My brother's were mostly formula and combo fed and I was exclusively breastfed as a baby. At one point my mom said that when she was a baby in '70s to when we were babies in the 90s people used to think that formula was superior to breast milk and only poor people breastfed. So it could be a sort of class thing too especially if your mother-in-law is older. She even said that double electric breast pumps weren't a thing back then, so even the thought of expressing milk wasn't that common it was breastfeeding OR formula. I pumped and did bottles and combo feed my first baby and I'm able to breastfeed my second and I greatly prefer breastfeeding over giving bottles. You know your baby best you're doing what's best for her, keep up the good work ️❤️
Absolutely keep doing what’s best, I won’t lie my son is exclusively breastfed and he’s now 6 months and very very attached to me. I do believe it played a part but we are their comfort and food supply so I don’t see the harm in responding and keeping our children feeling secure. My boy definitely has separation anxiety. If I walk away for 2 secs he’s screaming and crying but he hasn’t yet understood object permanence. In due time it should get better. The first year is so important in developing a secure attachment and responsiveness. I think the MILS fail to realize that we’re the new generation and we don’t agree with our children being away from us too much, I don’t know about any of y’all but I don’t think most of them did very good jobs with making us feel emotionally secure and responding to us so to me I look at it as what not to do LOL so if my child wants to have a tit in his mouth and be on my hip all the time that’s fine with me.
After all these are BABIES who have CUES and can’t do things on their own. You can’t spoil a baby who can’t even take care of themselves!
She is just frustrated she was not able to cuddle her because you were feeding. Its normal to have days like that when baby is little and its not spoiling them. Hopefully MIL grows up but its doubtful. I would take comments with a pinch of salt as she has 0 clue about breastfeeding and is jealous
Girl ignore her! It was the same with my mil until she seen the benefits with my first…. She didn’t breastfeed either. Would always say he’s never gonna come to be but he did after a while and he loves his meme… with my fiancée and I second child she doesn’t say much. And this one cluster feeds more… just ignore it and keep pushing.
You’re doing a fantastic job, you’re following your little girl’s cue, which is awesome. Cluster feeding is completely normal, trust me, you’re not going to spoil her. (I’m currently nursing my fifth.)
Your baby is literally a newborn. Tell your MIL to stop making comments because they're unwarranted and you're doing just fine.
She’ll just say he sure feeds a lot but it was more supportive now
I really wouldn’t worry especially seeing as she has no experience breastfeeding. Also our parents generation their babies were taken away at birth to be put in the nursery, they were told to only feed them at certain times of day etc. now we know about responsive parenting being best but unfortunately the older generations won’t always understand that. You are absolutely doing the best thing for your child! You can’t over feed a breastfed child. And making them feel safe is the best thing in the long term for them having a secure attachment style and healthy relationships! Ask your husband to tell her not to comment on that/give advice unsolicited. I know it’s hard, I haven’t even had my baby yet and my MIL has been telling my husband all sorts of nonsense about feeding which he then tried to convince me we need to do 🙄
ugh that’s annoying. just ignore her, you know your child best!
I felt the same way after my first baby. Everyone was constantly questioning me, and my mother-in-law even suggested formula multiple times. Now, with baby number three, I don’t even think about it. I really urge you to trust yourself. Your baby knows what she needs, and your body is responding perfectly! It’s incredible how this bond allows us to connect with our little ones. You might want to send your husband an article on cluster feeding and have him share it with her. I’m sure she just doesn’t understand. You’re doing an amazing job!
Your MIL can go suck a 🍤. Respectfully 🩷
It's so normal and so important to breast feed on demand (if you can) for bonding and to create your milk supply and postpartum healing especially in the beginning and clusterfeeding is usually because of a growth spurt or they need the comfort. You can't spoil a baby and it's normal for them to be attached to their momma. We grow them and keep them safe for 9 months and we're all they know besides voices during that time. She should understand that. She had her own kids to bond with and make choices for. My kids were very attached to me when they were babies and cluster fed a lot too and some people probably got frustrated with it but I did what was best for them.
Trusted by 5M+ women
Trusted by 5M+ women
I'd continue to breastfeed on demand, doing what is best for you and bubs. Others will always have an opinion, and that's okay, but we don't need to take it onboard. As others said your MIL might have been disappointed she didn't get more time with baby (but thats beside the point).
My MIL and others would say to me... "she can't be hungry again!". And I'd have to respond - "Well, she is!" and go breastfeed again. My daughter (now 1yo) has a healthy attachment to me and a preference for me, which is normal! We are their mum after all, lol. You do you! You're doing an amazing job 👏 ☺️
@Sandie ugh! i’m sorry that’s coming from your mother. that would be very frustrating. hoping you have other supportive people surrounding you!
@F X my thoughts exactly! yes, my husband told her where to go lol. he’s always got my back. i do try my best to enjoy the cluster feeds because i know i’ll miss them when they’re gone!
@Sarah that’s actually a really good point! she’s in her 60s so yeah that could very well be. it makes sense about the pumps not being a thing, too. we are lucky to have so many tools to do things in different ways now!
@Kindall my mother in law is very much pro breastfeeding so that's been a huge help.
@Christine i completely agree! i don’t see the harm in them being “attached” like isn’t that a good thing? they feel secure! like you said. good point about different style parenting and what not to do. lol. i just never thought of it because my mom parented very similar to what we do now and how i want to parent my girl. so it’s a bit shocking when MIL has such different views. she def didn’t do a good job of making her kids feel secure and you can still tell to this day. which also makes it hard because i want my daughter to have a good relationship with her grandma but i also don’t want her grandma to have any part of actually raising/teaching her lol howwwwww to manage that
@Christine THIS!!!!!!
@Becky probably 100% accurate 😅 thanks girl!
@Jade i’m glad she came around! isn’t it great when we get to prove them wrong haha
@Kristy aw congrats! what an amazing journey you’ve had, i’m sure! i’m definitely not worrying about spoiling!
@Monét i need your backbone!!! lol.
@Jade i’m glad you’re getting more support now!
@Kathryn i’m def not worrying, just annoyed! lol. but true! it used to be so different and it’s hard to remember that sometimes. omg. i’m sorry your husband is buying into what your mil is suggesting. hopefully he comes to realize that you know what’s best for yalls babe! when are you due?? congrats!
@Makayla good for you for doing what you know is best! it would be hard constantly defending your choices. and yes, the bond is incredible, something i didn’t quite imagine it would be. i’m loving this journey! good idea to send her info on cluster feeding. thank you!
Trusted by 5M+ women
Trusted by 5M+ women
@Lillian HAHA YEESSSSSS thank you 🤣😍
@Janessa right!! i feel like the most important thing is that my girl feels loved and secure at this age. if that means we are in bed feeding all day then that’s what we’ll be doing. it won’t be like this forever. i did learn about how breastfeeding and healing works in tandem with baby and i thought that was absolutely the coolest thing. momma and baby working together just like nature intended!
@Renee good advice not to take it onboard. i like that a lot. thanks! i’m so glad things are going well for you and your girl! lol. “well, she is!” i feel like that’s the story of my life haha. they really do tell us what they need!
@Kindall ya exactly and it's not always easy for us so we need support and it goes by so fast
@Kindall it does feel amazing! So keep going!!
My mother is pretty much the same way. It's a little frustrating.