I just need to vent or clarity

@Katherine

There is conflicting information because no 2 babies are the same. If baby is spitting up a lot when she wasn’t before, she isn’t ready for that volume. Her volume could be gradually increased to allow her to get used to it but jumping up to adding 50% on to her regular feeds seems a bit of an unrealistic idea. Perhaps you could see if you can start gradually increasing. Or even fortifying her formula for extra calories without so much extra volume? As great as it is to have a night nurse, you know your baby best. Don’t feel bad to voice your opinions on her methods. You’re doing a great job mama. Sorry it feels so tough right now 🫶🏻

Is this an independent consultant or did you hire her through a sleep program? You have the right to discuss and be heard if you're paying for a service. Babies are not intellectually advanced enough to be manipulative. That's just not a thing.

@Mollie I was just thinking the same thing babies are not robots. You can’t just make them eat at 7, 10 30 and 2 and 5. We don’t even eat like that. We’re hungry we fucking eat. Granted I understand we have schedules and work allows for us to eat lunch at a certain time but to put a five month old baby on a food schedule.

@Stephanie it’s from VIP nannies. She has been doing this for a long time 30+ years. But I think it’s a lot too fast.

Yeah, as a mother of 6. This sounds like way to much for a 5 month old. All babies are different. At that age they are SUPPOSED to want comfort, holding and to be loved on. If they are spitting up like that, that's overfeeding. You can't and shouldn't try to force her tummy to take what it can't take. Shouldn't force what's she's not ready for in any of this. Regardless of what the nanny says, YOUR the mom. YOU get to decide how things are done, not the nanny. And if this nanny isn't ok with it, then she's not the right one for your family. They are there to HELP YOU. Not take over all decisions. To be honest, this nanny doesn't sound like a good nanny to me. My youngest is 4 months old right now and doing some sleep regression lately. I know it's hard. But this is just a season. It will end. Do what you think is right for your baby and follow your instincts. Also, my 4 month old son only eats 4ozs at a feed. All my babies did at that age.

@Bree I don’t even know where to start and where to adjust to tell this lady that this is too much I’m trying to call people and talk to people to process this all so we can come with a game plan.

@Brooke I'd figure out what you want first, write it down. So when you sit down with her to discuss it, you can stay on point. I personally would start with the formula amount per feeding. Since you already know that's too much for her, since she's spitting up alot. Then as you figure what you'd like to change, write it down. You can also discuss your concerns with her and try to work together. But, something definitely has to be changed, especially if you're having concerns. You shouldn't be having to pay someone to stress you out more lol

okay, so my first son was just a bad napper. at first he did great, we did ferber at 5 months, and he was fine until about 10 months… for whatever reason, he just decided he didn’t want to sleep in the crib anymore for naps. we tried ferber again, it didn’t work, we hired a sleep consultant, that didn’t work either, he literally would just cry in his crib for an hour for like 2 months we tried changing wake windows and changing what we did, and even the few times he did fall asleep, he would stop after like two days even when everything else was exactly the same. i got sooo anxious it was consuming me. we just decided to clothe back to napping. sure it was hard, but it was so much better for him and at the end of the day, it was emotionally so much better for my anxiety too. the sleep consultant was great, but she couldn’t figure him out either. he still needs help to fall asleep for naps at 2 years old, but he just needs the security so he can calm down and sleep

every kid is different, maybe try for another day or two, and if your LO isn’t responding to it, change it up, follow your instincts and what works best for your family. at the end of the day, Americans are obsessed with sleep training, but lots of other countries don’t sleep train at all or do it differently, so it actually depends a lot on culture too.

@Thaisa one I hope the Ferber didn’t scare him. That’s my fear. And two I hope she doesn’t have a hard time with other regressions. I’m paying soooo much money and she is saying it should ever go back once they have the independent sleep skills. This makes me a bit anxious

My baby boy is 4mo 2 wks. I don’t have a night nurse, but before having him i had it in my head i was going to sleep train as well and tried in the very beginning to follow wake windows and all that but very quickly started getting stressed that he wasn’t going down for a nap when it was “time” or sleeping too much or he wasn’t falling asleep on his own. It was getting too stressful and he’ll only be a baby once & i want to enjoy it. Now i follow his cues i am a sahm so i have the flexibility to just go with the flow and i honestly prefer it this way. My baby used to eat 4 oz every 2 hours up until about month 3 i slowly started giving him more but that’s because i was following his hunger cues i never jumped from 4-6 because i wanted him to sleep thru the night he just naturally started eating more.

I slowly upped his ounces over a span of several weeks. He just turned 4 months and now eats 6 oz every 3 hours throughout the day so he does take about 4 feedings(like what your nurse is trying to do) before bed so i totally get what your nurse is trying to do cause he does sleep a longer stretch now at night but he will still wake up to feed. Bedtime is 7/8 pm wakes up once to feed around 3/4 am and then is ready for the day again at 7 am.. Not every day is the same some days he naps more some less. Sometimes he doesn’t eat too much so he’s up more at night and again i follow his cues if he wants to nap he naps if he wants to eat he eats. Sometimes he wants 6 oz sometimes just 2 or 4. I follow his cues. I think it’s unrealistic to feed a baby a specific # of oz every day and have them sleep a specific amount of hours. Us adults aren’t like that why would we expect a baby to.

I would talk to your night nurse and tell her you don’t feel comfortable force feeding your baby every baby is different. Not every baby will be able to take the same amount of oz a day some babies have a bigger appetite than others. I’d recommend just going with the flow talk to your night nurse and be direct this is your baby and always follow your instincts. Momma knows best. As a side note i don’t do any method to sleep he sleeps in his bassinet by the side of our bed and i am able to rock the bassinet by hand and that’s how he falls asleep. I still swaddle him and put him down when he’s sleepy/cranky. Sometimes it takes him 5 mins to fall asleep sometimes 20 or even 30 it can get overwhelming but it’s what’s working for us at the moment. Just do what works for you guys there really aren’t any rules & the sleepless nights won’t last forever. Wishing you the best!

@Veronica @Bree @Thaisa @Stephanie @MollieGet this the bitch walked out on me yesterday saying it’s not worth it because my daughter is sick and we can’t continue. Aka I’m pissed you had those concerns and I don’t think you are with the program. She knew my daughter had a runny nose on Wednesday and still took the job. wtf!!!! So she left me stranded yesterday to do it on my own when we agreed a week. She told my husband I’m not sure why Brooke thinks I had I’m forcing her baby to drink. Well did you address my concerns no!!!! And she came early said I’m here do you want me to come in or wait. I didn’t know that meant we need to talk aka I’m quitting. She came up stairs confronted me and then just walked way and I didn’t even know she left or quit. I thought she is letting me try putting her down for the night and standing in the hall. And she took her notes that she left for me with her. Petty ass bitch!!!