Sex and tears

I sort of have a similar thing yeah! I had an episiotomy 10 weeks ago and everytime ive had sex since, it hurts a bit and feels like its stretching Then i bleed a tiny bit after like a cut on a finger type bleed

I've had 2 second degree tears. Last one being 4 months ago and I was the same with both. Just took a little more time to heal

I’m 7 weeks pp from a second degree and episiotomy. Not attempted sex yet not looking forward to it lol

I would let it heal a bit longer, and lube! Loads and loads of lube.

UBERLUBE! I can not express this enough UBERLUBE is a life saver. It’s a silicone based lube (hyper allergic) it’s thicker than most lubes so keeps from tearing and any friction. No sex back to back. And foreplay is your bestie also. Never forget it takes YOU 40 minutes to be fully aroused. A man is ready to go in .5 seconds. Sex is about you at the moment not about him remember that.

2nd degree tears here on one side and the lower perineum and was stitched back up. I was SO scared of sex, waited the 6 weeks to be cleared, didn't attempt for another week and it was a total fail. He barely put the tip in and I was just in so much pain. It actually took like 2 or 3 more months to take him fully again, I just felt so much pressure and if he was tearing me apart. Occasionally there was a little blood but i was scared to check. I did go to the dr one more time to ask like are you sure im not broken? It was brutal on my husband emotionally as well. Slow and steady is the way to go and lube helped a lot. Since then, we are back to normal. Pelvic exercises are SO important!

@Courtney yeah mine is the same tbf, i’m starting swimming with my little one soon and i just really don’t want to be tearing bc it’s a infection risk if im swimming with it x

@Bec yeah i’m 4 months pp aswell, thought it would be better by now but no aha x

@Terri i didn’t have sex my whole pregnancy bc it didn’t feel right so i was looking forward to having sex again to feel that connection with my partner and the first time it hurt but then it got better but now it’s the fact i keep tearing a bit afterwards that’s annoying me 🤣x

@Kim i will do thank you! x

@Amanda ooo i will have to invest in this thank you! and we probably have sex once every two weeks if that bc i have to heal after tearing everytime🙈 and i never knew that that’s useful to know!! we both want it but the tearing is just making me not want to do it atm x

@Samantha yeah it’s been similar with me, it gets me down sometimes bc i want to feel that connection with my partner but i feel my body isn’t allowing it. i get frustrated aswell bc i blame myself that i tore so bad bc i had no pain relief so i pushed quickly to get rid of the pain which i feel resulted in me tearing 🙈 x

Get some neutral oil and start doing the perineal massage!!! I’m preg with #2 so started my massage again recently and it’s helped with mini tears so much!! Really softened that skin back up and released some of the scar tissue, I use the “my expert midwife” prep oil, all natural ingredients

@Charlotte thanks so much i’ll have to try this!! also congrats on baby number 2 🤍

Thank you! I hope it works as well for you🤍