The audacity
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"it's a test" ok I guess I failed then, might as well just do it ya damn self
I’m sorry - do you even live in this house? Bc you said you’re cleaning “his” house. F**k that - you’re his significant other not maid. Tell him to clean his own damn house - and he failed the test and can have a blast being alone in his messy ass house
He sounds like someone who lives with his mother. She raised that mess, and she can clean up after him. Walk, girl!
Sounds like you need to leave either way. His mother asking you to clean his house for them isn’t an honor And he’s ungrateful You’re fighting to keep a bad prize (the right to clean his house)
I should give some context. We are engaged. His mother is living with him because she has a year left until retirement and wants to move south. That EVENTUALLY will be my house as well, that’s why I also didn’t mind the cleaning. But he constantly makes remarks about my house .. stupid shit like “when’s the last time this toaster was cleaned?” “Ur ceiling fans are disgusting.” Yet I have 3 layers of dog fur and dust stuck to me and grime. Mind you I also have two herniated disks in my back and he had the nerve to ask if I moved the dresser to get the baseboard behind it. I said no I absolutely did not move the fucking dresser I did every other baseboard I could. I just want to cry. He said he was busting chops but really? Maybe I’m too sensitive.
I don't think you should move in together. You have come across an area of critical incompatibility. Do you want to spend the next 20 years listening to him complain about this stuff without lifting a finger? He needs more time to live on his own and clean his own baseboards before subjecting you to a lifetime of constant, needling complaints. Do not do this, and spend the holiday giving thanks for this wake up call.
Yeah, but it’s not your house right now and he’s treating you like his maid. No. Hard no. Walk away. Real men don’t treat women like that.
@Bonny that’s the thing. He admits he’s a slob and said his room is embarrassing and a disgrace . Hes also gotten on my case about cleaning my house every day saying it’s not necessary. So I’m not sure where the hell this has come from. Ego defense thing due to embarrassment of his home? Nevertheless you don’t do that to someone who is doing YOU a favor. It really pissed me off, I was fuming. I told him to get the hell out of my face and go upstairs or something before I leave. I understand everyone has their own version of clean. My clean and your clean may be different. Then jump in and help so it’s both our cleans? His mother is paying me to do this so I was already a nervous wreck that it wouldn’t be good enough, therefore I wasn’t going to accept the money. Now I am. I’m literally congested from the amount of dust and dog hair I cleaned the last two days. And I don’t judge. I could care less. But at the end of the day don’t throw stones when you live in a glass house.
yeah no, accept the money because you're doing your best, and if he wants other shit done outside of that, then he can do it himself. "did you get the baseboards?" "nope, would you mind doing it? you would? then I guess they're not getting done :)"
@Sarah I wish I could stab him in the eyebrow with a fork sometimes LOL. He gets upset when I move or lift anything due to my back. I’ve had this issue since May and the injections aren’t working and I may need surgery. Then he literally asks if I moved a damn dresser to get to the baseboard behind it? Uhm sir?
Girl, you don’t live with this man and he’s literally treating you like the maid. Do you think it will improve when you actually live there if he has the audacity to talk to you like this right now
Like seriously 🤬🤬🤬
Nope. I'm not cleaning anyone's house who refers to it as "his". And if i was told it was a test I'd be sitting down with everyone to go over why they felt a "test" was needed on someone who has a herniated disc or two!? And why no one who lives in the house was helping to prepare the house for a FAMILY get together... If he's "usually" on your case about doing stuff...and is treating you like this "all of a sudden" then his "care" is performative. I would really consider the engagement because there's no way he asked you to get on your knees and scrub baseboard knowing you have a really injured back. Ain't no way that man expected you to move furniture to get to those baseboard and ain't no way he expects you to do all of the cleaning on your own...if he did...and that bothered you then you need to sit down and discuss this because this could be a really big issues of longterm incompatibility.
Nah he can keep living with his mom.
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I’m wondering if his mother asked me to do this so I see what I’m getting myself in to when she moves out lol. 🧐
Everything about this is wild, i would walk out
Just wanted to update. Future MIL has been home from Florida for 2 hours now (I cleaned while she was gone idr if I mentioned that) and not even a thank you call yet. I guess it’s still early? I went there today and fiancé had a sink full of dirty dishes and shit all over the counters I scrubbed. He wanted me there to help him with work around the house he needed to do, and get my input etc. I ended up leaving because he was a complete mess and there was no way I could help him amongst his chaos (he has adhd). Plus he was in a pissy mood. He got upset that I left and said I’m not a team player. I said I just cleaned ur house for two days straight I think I’m more than a team player and walked away. He can do the shit by himself and see what it feels like to be unappreciated. I’m not liking how I’m feeling right now if I’m being honest. I feel extremely unappreciated and worthless. I already fight with those demons in my head, and this worsened it.
Leave him to his momma you have no obligation to become this man’s maid
I think it's sweet you think a thank you call is coming... You are a kind person and really don't deserve this. ❤️
He is using you, and this is only a preview of what your life would be like if you stay. You're worth more than this. You deserve to be treated with respect, kindness, and be happy. Life's too short to be some man baby's maid.
His mother paid me $100 today and told me she owes me more but I won’t accept it. I told her what he said and she said he’s an asshole and he cleans like shit don’t listen to a word he says about cleaning
Wow Good luck sis and talk to him if not change walk