Stepkids

Anyone else finding it hard to balance life with your little one and step kids? My partner has 2 girls with 2 other mums and we have 1 girl together. His other 2 girls are older (10 & 13) and he used to have them both every weekend but as they’re getting older, he’s letting them make the decision on whether they come or not (bearing in mind, it’s over 2 hour journey to pick them up and bring them back to ours) I’m constantly asking him what’s happening on the weekend coming and don’t find out until the Thursday or Friday as to whether they’re coming or not which then feels too late to arrange plans and book days out. I feel like my daughter is missing out due to this as we end up spending most weekends in the house or last minute plans like just going for a walk. I really want to take my daughter abroad whilst she’s still young but he’s dead set on the fact we have to take them all which we really can’t afford. This is really frustrating for me, why should our daughter miss out on these things when his other girls had holidays growing up? What’s everyone else’s opinions? Is it unfair to take our LG and not the other 2?

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It’s tricky, I’ve got 2 step kids too and i often want to do stuff with just us 3, I actually get frustrated when they are here and I know I shouldn’t. Anyway regarding holidays, my fella is like you actually but I feel guilty not taking them on holiday. His ex often accuses my fella of treating the boys differently. It is tough, where possible I would try and include them. But when budgets don’t allow it’s really hard, I can see where your partners coming from as it’s his kids, could you do a cheaper holiday in the UK?

@Liz I feel exactly the same!! And we could, but I feel like that’s how it’s going to have to be all the time because we’re struggling to save so it’s always going to end up being UK holidays however they still get to go abroad with their mums side, so my daughter still misses out on a holiday abroad 😕

Ahhh I get you, see in my case his two kids never get to go away rarely so it’s different to you. Do you think you could try and get him to compromise and say take your baby on holiday together abroad and next year or year after (when you can afford it) do a holiday here with everyone, sell it to it that you take the kids in turn. Or you could even suggest something like having a fun packed weekend after or before taking yours on holiday and go to a theme park or do done exciting stuff they may not do all the time so he feels like he just isn’t point blank excluding them from stuff? I know how expensive holidays are, my step kids are boys in their teens and literally eat so much lol plus everything is adult prices for them as they aren’t so little anymore 😩 btw we haven’t managed to take ours on holiday due to money but we have been away just the two of us and we ended up hiding it as we couldn’t be arses with their mom saying why haven’t you taken the kids. Having stepkids is tough!

Yehh I may suggest it and see what he says. If he’s still certain it’s not fair then I might just say I’m booking one for me and her and invite my mum along instead

Plus we have to go in school hold if we take them whereas we don’t if taking our LG. This more than doubles the cost doesn’t it!!

That’s literally what I thought after I sent the message to say if he won’t compromise you do your own thing, he probably won’t like it but in this scenario your bubs will never get to go away so as long as he can appreciate you’re taking the kids in turn and they all get the same opportunity just not together or all at the same time then that’s ok, maybe that’s the angle you try him with. Best of luck ❤️

@Liz yeh deffo! Thank you 🥰

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