Daughter Acting Different

So I broke up with my daughter’s dad back in July, he didn’t see her for the first 3 months (I asked him for a long time to please come see her, but he refused so I stopped). She’s now 2 and goes to her dad’s Monday and Wednesday from 11-5, and every time she comes home she is so grumpy and acts so different. I know it’s hard for her, but he never gives her a nap and I’m potty training her right now and he never tries to have her go on the toilet. It’s so hard to coparent with him. We have mediation on the 10th and these are all things I’m going to bring up. That, and I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if his grandma talks shit about us to her (I know she can’t understand it). She used to tell me all the time that she was going to kidnap her and bring her to Tijuana so I couldn’t find them, and of course would always say she was joking. But the point is, that now I can’t trust her and I don’t find that to be an appropriate joke. I’m not sure if I should bring this up to the mediator or not, but I don’t feel comfortable with her being around our daughter. Picture of my daughter just because 💜

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Bring up anything and everything with the mediator! My brother also got a GAL through the court to help and after 6 years he finally got primary custody! The GAL works specifically with the kids involved

Bring up everything in mediation comments like that is why my kids aren’t allowed to be alone with their dads family

Shes adorable. Bring up everything in mediation, lay it all on the table.

My daughter who will be 3 in 7 weeks is usually really grumpy after spending a weekend away with her dad. We went thru mediation to figure out parenting time and he pretty much gave me all decision making responsibilities and all he wanted was alone weekend visitation rights when it works for himself. We just built up to longer visits as she was only a year old when he started taking her himself and 18 months when she had her first overnight with him. It’s definitely a hard transition for them and my daughter is only starting to come back in somewhat a ok mood after a year and a half

I'm experiencing this with my two year old, his tantrums go into overload and he becomes really clingy, it takes him about a week to readjust.

@Anita same! My daughter constantly wants me to hold her, and when I don’t she throws a fit.

Thank you ladies for your advice, I’m feeling a lot better about going to mediation next week. I hate that i feel guilty for saying things, but at the same time I know I need to so that my daughter has the best life. Her dad goes through these phases of getting so stressed that he has panic attacks and blacks out, which I’m worried about her being with him. The only reason she goes with him right now is because his mom is living there, but he’s on section 8 and she isn’t even supposed to be there. So as soon as that ends, there won’t be anyone else there and I’m worried about that.

I felt guilty about saying that stuff too but also you don’t want to feel regret afterwards for not saying things that need to be sorted out. AND when you do say things, don’t minimize them. Like you said, it’s for your baby to have the best life. It’s not about pettiness. You’ll do great :)

@Sosa thank you so much, I’m honestly hoping he forgot about it and doesn’t show up lol. But either way, I made a list of things I need to talk about.

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