Am I wrong?

So my husband thinks I have a "boss" syndrome, where I'm more authoritative in my parenting. He is super laissez-faire, jokes around a lot and unless- he is the definition if a "fun dad" & I love that, he's a wonderful father. BUT he lets a looot of things go with our 5yr old. She's our oldest (we have a 3 yr old, 1.5 yr old and 5 month old), I'm a stay at home mother, she only goes to kindergarten for 3 hrs, she she is home all day with me and the babies because my husband comes home around 3. Oh, besides the point but I have no dishwasher and I exclusively pump, so a lot of sippy cups, bottles, pump parts etc. 70% of my day is spent in the kitchen lol I just want my 5 yr old & the other children to respect me so if I'm trying to be consistent and not let things go & insist on her stopping something or not being so "smart alecky" in her responses then I think he should back me up. I need her to respect and she is super strong willed, headstrong and might have mild ADHD. It's pretty tough parenting her because she can be a bit aggressive and super tantrumy still at 5. Idk I just wish he would stop telling me "do you have to fight about everything?" "this is what you decide to fight with her about?"- mind you, it's not fighting, it's me telling her to clean something up or stop doing a particular thing.
Like
Share Mobile
Share
  • Share

Show your support

unless someone is getting hurt, he doesn't discipline much*

Stand your ground! Someone has to put their foot down. Dads thrive on letting their girls rule the world.. he’s PROUD of that as he should be. Every father wants a daughter that he knows isn’t going to be easy to get over on. It’s your job as mom to stand your ground and stay persistent with what you need her to do.

@LeKenya that's actually a really good way of going about it. Thank you for that perspective. I just get upset when he reprimands me or questions me in front of her because it seems like they are both ganging up on me

I don’t think you’re wrong or right. I think it’s going to be based on situation to situation. You have to remember they are kids and they are going to do things you’re not going to like but your husband does need to back you up as y’all are partners. So maybe there is some type of middle ground, he may see it as you’re too uptight and you see it as he’s not uptight enough. It’s hard to know cause we don’t live your day to day life so don’t know the situations.

@Nikki I was (we, actually) raised with spankings. Thankfully, we don't do corporal punishment, so I rely on being more assertive than anything else because otherwise, she literally won't listen

I understand but even being assertive sometimes it can be too much for a kid. I do time out over spankings but there are times my husband will call me out and say I need to be nicer to my son but I do these same to my husband if I feel like he’s being too tough on him. They’re just kids and innocent and not trying to do harm. So sometimes our frustrations can come out as being more assertive than what is meant to be.

Read more on Peanut
Trending in our community