Have you thought about an elective c section? I had one with my first baby due to fear of childbirth and it was an amazing experience and so calm! Obviously everyone is different but my recovery was fine too. Something to think about if you have previous trauma x
hi, i’ve had 3 babies back to back (so one every year for the last 3 years thanks to God), my first was delivered with suction cups and i had a 2nd degree tear, my second baby i had an episiotomy because i had no feeling at all when it came to pushing as she became really distressed (i clearly wasn’t ready to push but unfortunately with the epidural you can’t really avoid being told when to push), my third baby has just arrived 5 days ago once again with another episiotomy and forceps, and i also sustained a 2nd degree tear - so in the grand scheme of things, let my experience be a reminder of how incredible our bodies are, we have the ability to heal like magic quite literally thanks to God - its very much possible to continue to have vaginal deliveries with no complications with previous history of most birth injuries❤️
I had a episiotomy & forceps with my first son in 2022, I had my second son in January and he popped out with four pushes, labour was 36 minutes start to finish 😅 no tears and the best recovery
I’m not sure if it will help but you can have a birth after thoughts appointment to go through what happened at the birth which might help with the trauma & may answer your questions about next time.