Postpartum baby blues or just real fucking emotions?

Why do you feel they lied to you? A section would usually be needed for a medical reason, for either yourself or baby.

This must feel really horrible and have made your head a bit 🤯😶‍🌫️. Hearing from friends there's no emotion that's not normal after having a baby! I think it's so important to remember what you've just done for the past 9 months though, and what your body has just gone through too - it's nothing short of a miracle. You've grown and birthed (even if in a plan B way) a whole person and nobody can take that away from you. 😊 There are many consequences with medical intervention, but there are also many consequences with natural birth sometimes and we can never know what 'would have' happened. But you're both here safe. ♥️ You are mum and you are now in charge 💪🏾 Take it slow and take care of yourself.

I had a homebirth planned that ended up a 66 hour, full of interventions, traumatic birth so I know where you are coming from. I often regret getting pushed into things i didn't want but on the flip side I have am amazing LG and I am thankful everyday for her. You are so vulnerable while in labour and health care professionals can be very pushy. The first few weeks are hard with emotions, hormones, lack of sleep, sadly you can't change what happened and although it's hard you should know you did the best you could with the circumstances you faced. You have some incredible moments coming with your little one, mine is 12 weeks old and I rarely think about the birth now, I wouldn't do it again but that's for various reasons not just the birth. Things will get better and you will be able to accept what happened xx

They lied to you? What happened ?

I had an emergency c section and it was the best thing I ever did, she wasn’t coping with labour and needed out. I can also now be an advocate for sections in my family as I loved it and my labour and my family worriers so they now have piece of mind that it isn’t bad at all xx

I felt exactly the same in august when i had my girl. Had planned a home birth and ended up in emergency c section after they broke my waters in hospital and didnt give me fluids so i got dehydrated from vomiting, etc. a combination of awful things. I cried so much and every time i cried it felt like my guts were going to pour out, which made me want to cry even more. At home every thing was just as we left it during my home birth hours and it all broke my heart. Everyone said “at least you’re both healthy and well” and yes, ok, but that doesn’t negate the trauma and huge disappointment. Eventually after a couple of weeks of having my beautiful girl and the enormous support from my spouse and my mum, i started to feel a lot happier and stopped thinking about it so much. It still hurts but we may yet get another chance. Sending hugs x

I felt the same way and I ended up working with a postpartum therapist. I feel SO much better after working with her. Message me if you want her info, she takes insurance and I’m pretty sure she’s taking on new clients. I’m so sorry you experienced that 🧡

Yes this happened to my friend, your feelings are real and valid. I’m sorry they lied to you and that it didn’t go as you’d hoped. Everything is on your path so learn from the experience, and reclaim your power ❤️

As a mum of 3 who has had 3 very different birth experiences (all vaginla deliveries though) this is why I'm against having a birth "plan", as so often plans don't go to plan! After reading some of the heartbreaking stories for baby loss awareness week, I'm just happy my babies are here ❤️. Pls don't take this as me invalidating your feelings because I'm not, but I think sometimes we need to see the bigger picture. Although, you would probably benefit from some counselling sessions to process your feelings x

@Rebecca i was constantly very aware throughout my pregnancy that things could end up in a c section, that birth rarely goes to plan, etc, but nothing really prepares you for how unfair things can be and how traumatic it can be when you think things could have gone differently if it wasn’t for X and Y, even when everyone is nice and everything seemed fine. It doesnt matter whether you made a plan or not.

How were you lied to? I’m sorry you feel robbed of the experience, but how your child comes into the world does not matter as long as they are born with air in their lungs. Try not to beat yourself up, it does sound like postpartum blues, i felt the same after my emergency c-section, even though i wanted a c in the first place! The hormones are crazy but, If you truly feel you were deceived, take it further and open an enquiry.

I had an emergency c-section and cried a lot about it. It was hard for me to tell my birth story since it was so traumatic. I can tell you it gets better! You will feel better as time passes and you heal physically emotionally and mentally. Like you said you got your healthy baby 🩵

I had an emergency c section. Was put all the way under and didn’t wake up for two hours. I am sad I missed those first precious hours. I am not having more babies so that was it. I’m still sad about it 2 years later, but the sting is gone.

I’m so sorry this happened to you. You deserve to be seen and heard. Do you have a therapist or counselor you could talk to or see to help you process?

@Melody they kept doing cervical checks, but with the 7th one I knew it was a lie when she said I was still 3 cm and that she recommends a c section. I felt so much pressure in my butt and vagina by then. She knew it was no real emergency and I wouldn’t choose any other way. I was a first time mom so labor should be expected to be longer. In the end the surgeon was speaking recklessly while operating on me saying things like “ we’re here because the mom didn’t listen to me and now the baby is in distress” and “this is the hardest job I’ve ever had to do” … after the c section, I saw pics of her that my husband took out of the wound where her head was coned already. That’s when I knew she lied to make me choose a c section.

@Tristan yes but I do not want to talk to her

@Jenny 🥺🥺🥺🥺

@Yesenia thank you. I pray things get better!

@Marina exactly! I was very aware and I always accepted that if it would save me or baby, I would do it… however that just wasn’t the case! It was all about deception and that truly grieves me

@Ashreil very serious accusations there, suggest you consult with a professional to help you mentally heal

First labour is supposed to be longer. My midwives kept rushing me in subtle ways. I know if they had stopped doing so many checks, if they had given me fluids before i got so severely dehydrated, if they had let me rest instead of constantly talking to eat other next to me and having the blinds wide open… I KNOW I would have had my baby naturally that same day. But no, they broke my waters to rush me, they wouldn’t believe I wasn’t peeing bc U was dehydrated, they forced me to have the catheter, they said I wasn’t progressing fast enough and sure enough, baby’s heart rate ended up going too high and I reached 8 cm but had to be rushed for a section. Even the nicest midwives seem to have no respect or understanding of what you need when you’re in labour.

This is exactly how I feel. I only produced oxytocin in bed with my man relaxing. They constantly asked “how are your contractions every second of that day. And made me exercise. No matter how much I said the contractions slow down while I’m moving around, they didn’t listen. In the end, getting an epidural and sleeping is what really brought the pressure. I’m so disappointed because I studied so much for that day… I had 2 midwives and a doula and still ended up being short of wisdom. I’m so disappointed in myself.

@Ashreil it’s not our fault but I feel exactly the same. I felt so prepared. I was actually so excited. I was not scared at all, I knew the kinds of things they do to rush us and things that slow labour down etc… after being so exhausted and getting the epidural i felt like a different person. I did not think clearly.

@Marina yeesss I wasn’t scared either.. and I was really excited as well! It meant so much to me and that’s why I feel robbed. I just knew I wouldn’t be the one who they could fool because I knew everything I needed to know. Thanks for empathizing and understanding