Dealing with life

I’m lucky enough to be receiving some return to work coaching and my coach told me to look at working parents who seem to have things under control, and pay close attention to what corners they’re cutting. You physically can’t do everything! It doesn’t have to be the same corners you cut all the time, so nothing should ever get too out of hand. It could be things like: Be ok with doing the hoovering etc a little less often, or employ a cleaner if you’re in the position to do so. Buy a healthy ready meal some days instead of cooking from scratch. Pop your hair in a ponytail some days instead of styling it. Pop a nursery rhymes video on YouTube for little one for 20 mins while you get something done. Know when a piece of work is “good enough” rather than trying to get it perfect. Don’t forget you’re new to being a working parent and you’ll get better at juggling it all as time goes on, but it will always be a juggling act and that doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong!

I’m also very overwhelmed, I feel like I get so angry at small small things becz there are so many things to do, especially on weekends. And my little girl still doesn’t eat well, is a bad sleeper and now going through sleep regression and has now started crying/screaming about little things (that mean big to her) , these things trigger me a lot, and leads to arguments with my husband. I just want to be my best self for her as I am already ridden with guilt due to working full time but I just don’t know when things will get better or easier. I feel like a failure 😞

I'm not managing 😂 I work part time as I now have 2 children with 2 pick up times in 2 different places, a new house that I'm trying to renovate. Literally zero time to do anything for myself and no sleep at the moment is causing arguments with myself and my husband. The only silver lining is, as this is my second child, I know there is light at the end of this very long stressful tunnel. Keep going ladies, you're doing great. 💕

@Amy please tell me when did it get little easier with your first becz all everyone tells me is it never gets easy 🥲

@Simi just remember, if it was like this forever, nobody would have more than one baby. My first born was a nightmare as a baby, he had plenty of issues. He then got a lot better around 18months and now he's almost 6 he's a pain in the arse again 😂 Luckily, I also have a nephew who is a year older and I know that he was the same when he was 5/6 and he's much easier now. They all have phases but this baby into toddler phase is especially hard as they want to just do everything but they can't so they're ridiculously frustrated.. meaning mums are frustrated too as they want independence but also can't actually do anything for themselves. 😩 I promise, give it 6 months and you'll look back and think "wow, that was HARD!" life as a parent will always be challenging for different reasons but this is especially hard x

@Amy thankyou so much for this!! Really this has made me feel so hopeful 💕 I literally laughed when I read they are “ridiculously frustrated” 🤣 that’s exactly how I’d describe my little girl at this point.

My whole life has been filled with my Lo and have no time for myself ( i used to work but contracting done, now a house wife) she is very bad sleeper at night, she will wake up multiple times at night and i feed her only then she sleeps, i dont have proper sleep from ages i feel like. While bathing her my back pain and with all house chores , upper back pain becoming worse and worse. Need to check with GP , im just hoping that life wl become easy for me :( and for all the mothers out there

I honestly can’t tell you the last time I cleaned. It’s just not a priority time-wise for me anymore so I’ve hired a cleaner to keep the place hygienic. You definitely cut corners to juggle everything else.

This is one of the main reasons women don’t reach the top at work and burn out. We are so determined to have everything under control and that just isn’t possible! Think about what will matter to you in 10+ years time, choose to focus on what’s important. For me, that’s career and giving my little one the best start. The housework can go to hell (we’ve now got a cleaner), at the moment being in peak physical health can go to hell too! (Break your own rules is a great read for freeing yourself from pressure to be perfect!) I’ve recently read “how to keep house while drowning” and that’s got some great tips on staying on top of life and accepting that your house serves you (and therefore must be functional) but isn’t your failure if it doesn’t look instagram ready! Things like having a wash basket everywhere people take off clothes rather than just in 1 room. It is incredibly hard and I’ve definitely still not got the balance right!