Idk what to do .. I seriously need advice!

My sister and I live together just for a few months. I’ll be moving soon but I’m left with damage.. when I first moved my baby was 11months , my niece just turned 2. My niece is a child from hell . I’m not even over exaggerating. She throws EXTREME body tantrums. She’s mean to my daughter hits her constantly, cusses her out, just overall bullies my baby. She’s disrespectful to adults hits and cusses at them also… Fast forward my daughter is 18 months and doing everything she’s experienced. Shes mean to other kids , she tries to cuss, shes hitting. All things she’s seen my niece do.. this is making me so very depressed and defeated.. I didn’t want to raise a mean child.. I didn’t want her sweet innocence to be taken away this early.. she was so sweet.. up till 18months it’s like it all sank in and she started to act it out.. how and where do I start to reverse this. I’m seriously crying thinking abt the damage another child has done to mine .. and I’m always around I never leave them to play alone. She will hit my kid in front of my face. She will tell me “I’m abt to go push her down” I’ve done the best I could to protect my daughter.. all I can do now is hope there’s a way I can reverse this 😞 I’m so fuckin sad..

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Loads of grace for you and your baby!!!! People who have not walked in your shoes may judge you out in public. If you let it get to you, you will push your kid to behave better out of having a good image in public. Love the crap out of her and be the role model of joy and kindness that you want her to be. It will rub off on her in due time. Be a safe place for her. Babies crave connections with their mothers.She may express some nasty things and throw some horrible fits.Let her let it out. If she sees you still love her, the need to do it will go down. Give her reminders that it's not okay to treat you rude. Do not lecture in the moment. Prep her while she is calm for how to take deep breathes when she is not calm. Practice, practice, practice! The time of the meltdown is not the time to teach, get through the moment. Reward her every time she does something kind or has a good attitude. If you draw attention to the behavior that you want her to have, that is what you will get more of.

Look up Becky Kennedy on youtube. She teaches on how to be a safe place for your kid. It does include incorporating structure. Baby steps. She teaches moms how to restore their relationship with their children after they lose their cool. It happens to the best of us. Watch Gabor Mate on the need every person has to be authentic. Adults learned how to shut themselves off in infancy. Loads of grace! You can't turn a purple couch into a pink couch just by wishing it. It's a process to reupholster.

Laura Markham is a pro! She is also on YouTube. She has practical advice for dealing with Littles. She is part of "Peaceful Parent Happy Kids". You are a human who has gone through so much. You don't have model that you are peaceful, happy, and are well composed. You want to model that you don't give up. Maybe you cry real hard sometimes. And you explain to your kid what you do to get through to the other side. I tell my kids I take therapy to talk to someone when I'm sad so that she can give me the tools to do it on my own. You are a human, you cannot model perfection. You model progress. Progress is up and down but overtime you get to where you fight to be.

Loads of grace for you and your baby girl. She was in hell not by her choosing. You were doing your best and are making steps to remove her from that. She is lucky to have you.

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