For those whose babies were in nicu right after giving birth how did u feel?

It's really just a surreal soul sucking emotion to not have your baby for those important cuddle moments. It bursts your newborn bubble. Mines didn't go right into nicu. We had her for 12 hours before they had to take her cause her bilirubin was dangerously high. So idk if that made the emptiness even worse's and I couldn't bring myself to the nicu the first 6 hours to see her without breaking down in tears by the time I made it back into the room. So her dad was on delivering whatever colostrum I could manage to pump. But the moments I got to just hold her little hand while in the incubator I cherished and when I got to hold her again for the first time was utter bliss. It's a roller coaster of emotions at a time your emotions are already high so it's tough but allow yourself the time to breakdown and cry if you need to the brave face is hard to keep on. Best of luck to your little one and hope fast healing ❤️❤️❤️

@Jessie thank youuu !

No problem. And remember to look after yourself as well. My nicu doctors had to remind me that I matter as well. Your babe is safe under 24/7 care and surveillance. I know it's hard but try and get some rest and babe will get better in due time ❤️❤️❤️

@Jessie yes i find myself being hard on myself I have second degree tear and wish I could go spend more time w her but finally got some energy to.

It was the worst feeling in the world for us. She went straight to the NICU at a different hospital so I didn’t even meet her for 4 hours after birth and we had to wear gloves to even touch her. I cried so much for those first 12 days because of all the stress from family and the doctors not telling us anything. Only a couple nurses actually let me change her. I wanted to breastfeed so bad and was pumping at home but the nurses kept feeding her big bottles so I never produced enough milk for her. Even the lactation nurses tried telling them to slowly feed her so she wouldn’t get mad on my breast but they didn’t listen so it never worked out. My husband and I really leaned on each other hard. My parents actually forced us out to eat with them for our birthdays so we would stop eating at the hospital. When he went back to work and she was still there, my mom came to sit with me so she could make sure I took care of myself and ate too so I’m grateful for that because I would’ve never left

I did love that they gave her a book a day so I could read to her to pass the time and connect with her. Looking back, I’m also glad I got to heal before fully caring for her. She came out sunny side up so my tailbone was wrecked and it was easier to heal and take it slow when she was getting 24/7 care at the hospital. It gets better! She’s now 2 and thriving! We are actually expecting our second in March because it was all worth it!

Initially I was so out of it and exhausted I just passed out, then when I went to visit him the next day I just cried and cried - I was so scared he was going to die. He was in for 10 days and it felt like forever. When me and my partner left the hospital without him we both burst into tears in the car park, I went to the hospital twice a day to see him but I felt very ill so it was hard and I just kept crying. I couldn’t hold him for 8 days so getting him out felt amazing and it felt so good getting him home and have everyone see him! The only slight pro is that you get to rest and recover without having to look after a baby 24/7 The people looking after him were amazing, I could tube feed him my colostrum and change his nappy - it feels like a lifetime but just keep going and being there for your baby and know they will get out soon and it’ll be amazing!! X

My first baby was in for 40 or so days and my twins were in for 65 days. You feel incredibly empty especially when you are discharged without them. I couldn’t hold my babies for 3 days because they were before 30 weeks and at risk for brain bleeds that early. That is probably the worst feeling.. just watching them and not being able to hold them right away. I lived at the hospital with my first but with my twins it was a lot harder to make it down there(we moved further and I had little help with our toddler). Either way, I felt guilt leaving whether I was there around the clock or for a bit each day. But that feeling of them finally being able to come home is amazing. Happiest day.