I know this is normal but I just need a space to share what I’m feeling.

My 21 month old will scream, screech and cry the whole time I cook. I do home cooked meals and will usually only need an hour to make whatever we eat, and the whole hour my little one is screaming screeching and crying. I put a show on for her to watch, have her on the highchair near me, give her wooden spoons, pots and pans, give her snacks and even sing to her but she will still scream. I can’t afford to always get takeaway and don’t have any relatives near by. She’s also not napping anymore and by the time she’s in bed, I’m too drained to start meal prepping for the next day. I am starting to feel heart palpitations and I know it’s only a short while and she will grow out of it but boy is this stage hard. After finishing up cooking I’m left feeling like I’ve just had a panic attack (I know what this feels like because I’ve had panic attacks before)
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Not sure if you are looking for advice or just a rant but I’m a big fan of Loop earplugs. You can still hear everything so they are safe but it just takes everything down a few levels so you’re not being dropped into a state of panic. When my little girl cries or has a tantrum I feel like I can go from 0 to 100 in an instant and these really help me to not get overstimulated.

It’s so hard. I find myself feeling so awful when I’m cooking and she’s like this and I don’t feel like I have enough energy to even attempt to make it fun by that point in the day. I have found our toddler tower to be somewhat of a help and I plan to get her some toddler knives so hopefully she can help me more, which she does enjoy. Another thing that may help if you feel like you can carry her is a carrier. It helps me feel less guilty about not holding her, and she can see what I’m doing, but she is extremely heavy in there now so it’s not the best solution! Loop earplugs sound like a great option too. It may also be worth thinking about how you managed your panic attacks before (therapy, medication, coping techniques etc), if you did. And if you didn’t, may be worth thinking about going to gp about it. I hope it gets easier for you ❤️

I’d suggest trying to prepare meals in the slow cooker a few times a week 💙

I’m sorry if this is not suitable to your circumstances but I try and meal prep during naptime so I’m with them the whole time during any wake window. The most I can do when my twins are awake is make a cake batter or something or put something in a pressure cooker - anything that’ll take care of itself for a bit. When they nap at midday for a couple of hours I make a cuppa and try and do food prep for them and on a day when my husband is also home I tend to bulk prep for the week as much as possible. Sorry you’re feeling this way - this stage of tantrums and screeching is intense. Believe me, I know! When I need to do a quick task in the kitchen I try and sit them down with a little snack or something to do (like a specific exciting kitchen toy which isn’t ever taken into the living room and accessed all the time) and that does let me sometimes spend 10 mins sorting the dishwasher or washing machine out etc

My LO does it if I'm cooking and they're hungry or just want to be involved, as I cut up veg I'll give them some. Then, as hard as it is I'll put LO on my hip as I stir rice or I'll get them to pour the pasta into the pan etc. Also found that LO likes to use wooden veg with pans in the kitchen at the same time, they'll play on the floor with theirs as I try to cook. Doesn't always work and often I put Paddington on tv or something with a snack and a drink, that'll work for a few minutes at least. Hope it gets better for you, it's not easy at all, totally underrated this toddler business! X

@Charlotte I second these.

It’s really hard, mine hangs off my legs and it drives me mental. I have found a toddler tower helpful, and she loves doing ‘chop chop’ - you can get toddler knifes, give them some fruit/veg and let them hack at it. She’ll happily stand and cut a cucumber or pepper while I prep dinner. Have a look at some easy activities to set up - like cut a hole in the top of an old container and give them pom-poms or lolly sticks to put in the box. Give them dry pasta to put into pots or stir in a bowl. Or sometimes she’ll play with some cups and water in the sink. Or do colouring/stickers. I try and do as much ahead of time or in the slow cooker too. Have a look at dump bags for the slow cooker. Switch to frozen chopped onions/peppers etc to save time.

Thank you for the suggestions everyone. She’s actually not napping in the day anymore so will have to wait till end of her day to cook. A bit more info on my little girl, she wants to sit on the cooker and tantrums every time because of this lol 😂 I can only laugh or I’ll go mental 😂 No games distract her because if this, she wants to press button and sit on it. But thank you soo much for all your suggestions

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