Toxic or not

Definitely could be the bipolar, is he medicated? For the child you might need to say he needs to go to therapy or go on meds or both if he wants to be in the child’s life. Bipolar isn’t necessarily dangerous but if he’s “unhinged” as I usually call it. You really don’t know how his brain will cope with what’s going on. I would just tread lightly and see if he might agree without having a whole argument

So from experience, being pregnant is one of the most difficult, emotional, and vulnerable times you will ever experience. It will be even more difficult if you do not have your partners full support. When I got pregnant my now husband was not happy. He did not treat me good when all I wanted was his love. That made me go through so much unnecessary stress. If you can, I would focus on you and the baby. I’m not sure if you guys live together. I would encourage him to get help to ensure that you and the baby have the best going forward. If he will go to couples therapy, give it a try. Don’t let him treat you bad or make the pregnancy miserable even though it can be so hard

It’s toxic and here’s why . Yes this is probably his bipolar disorder and his mental illness BUT he knows he has mental illness and is choosing to be unmedicated and he knows that him being unmedicated is not healthy for him or anyone around him and he makes that choice every day he doesn’t seek mental health treatment . I’m a person with mental health disorders and it’s very serious and I make the choice every single day to take my medication because I know that without my meds this is not a safe environment for my child or my partner .

Do not use his diagnosis as an excuse this is coming from someone who is diagnosed with bipolar disorder, I schizoeffective , and narcissistic personality disorder. It can be tamed with meds he chooses to let it unleash everyday he goes without

If he’s not showing you he’s working on it and it’s too much for you to handle does it really matter what the cause is. Personality disorders are mental illness as well.

I would go to therapy and see. Nows the time before the babies here. My dad suffered from bipolar as well and unfortunately took him till really now to get things under control without medication. Children are extremely overstimulating and if he doesn’t have control of his tongue/ behaviours now he will, and you will be in for it when baby arrives. I dont have an answer but as a momma you gotta do what you can to protect your future baby. My mom would use my dad’s bipolar against him kind of and he would use it as a scape goat but even as a child I would say then thats on you to get better and do what you need to to be better etc. (whether thats medication, therapy, some type of boundary for whats acceptable and whats not). Not that I dont think bipolar is the problem but its also what is allowed. My dad was very physically abusive and yes his bipolar probably made it alot easier to be disregulated but it is up to them to find ways to deal that dont effect and injure those around ❤️❤️

My ex partner has autism and would only be willing to be a parent or co parent so as long as we were on good terms (which isn’t always possible with someone so temperamental). I soon gave up on trying to co parent with him as his unstable moods and unpredictability proved that he couldn’t even be a father to our son. He has two other children with two different women and is the same with them. I believe it’s narcissism

Bipolar here and it’s not an excuse. It’s more of a responsibility if anything to be on your meds and realistic about your reactions and mental space. He has to seek treatment, this is not a disorder you can just mentally muscle through and I would honestly worry about him being a danger to the child if unmedicated. That’s just my honest opinion having it myself. I’m not okay when I am off meds.

Hi this sounds exactly like my “baby daddy” of I would even call him that. Broke my ribs at 12 weeks, kicked him out at 13 weeks, never saw him again. Tried to take me to court and then needed up not even showing up. I have full custody ❤️ I suggest you get out of it as fast as you can. Me and my boyfriend of over a year are both also unmedicated bipolar (maybe I like them crazy 🤷🏻‍♀️) and we function very very very well together. Like he treats me and my son like we are royalty

There is a pretty significant difference between Bipolar I and Bipolar II. Which does he have?

@Chrissy I'm not sure, I recently found out that he didn't get a proper diagnosis and now he's claiming to not even have bipolar and that it's just anger issues mixed with autism and adhd, im also autistic, have adhd, and borderline personality disorder and no matter how bad things get it's nowhere near as bad as he acts toward me when he's mad

@Luna I would say it is possible that he's using a diagnosis as an excuse. I definitely understand you wanting to be sympathetic to his diagnoses, while I also think it's important to be mindful of how you and your baby deserve to be treated. If his illness causes anger that leaves you feeling hurt and uncomfortable now, think about how you will be able to manage while under the stress of having a newborn as well. If he is unwilling to buckle down and gain control over his symptoms whether through intensive counseling or medication management, you will have to decide if this will be a healthy situation for you and the baby. I'm sorry you are going through something like this. Consider your options carefully and take time to talk it out with a professional as well if you can.