What would you do in my situation?

I hate my boyfriend I just think this is going to be my biggest regret ever getting with him I feel like in 20 years im gunna look back and think wtf are you doing why you still with this dick. Does anyone else think they’re boyfriend is like the worst ever? I know he isn’t as there are a lot worse boyfriends but when I was a kid I fantasised about havin a boyfriend and him being the most gentle kind caring ever but I’ve just got the complete opposite this person who calls me names all the time says he’s gunna do this do that to me ( it’s stuff like I’ll take your head off) he is just through and through the worst person I have ever met. He says if we break up it’s because of you not me yet I left him before for messaging other girls, so how would that be my fault your the lying cheat scum. I only got back with him cuz he didn’t stop calling me and messaging making it out like I’d cheated on him with the way he litro took a day off work I think just to call me. and then I found out I was pregnant and I didn’t know what to do.He acts sad sometimes and you can nearly hear him crying in his voice when I say I want to leave him I’m the type of person that does everything minute by minute and don’t really think about my actions like at all ,thinking everything will just go the way it’s supposed to but this definitely doesn’t feel right. I don’t kniw what to do cuz I don’t have it in me to leave trust me if I did I wouldnt be here on the sofa right now because he asked me to check something said WELL after 5 seconds so I spoke to him moody I just went it’s loading but I spoke to him moody cuz he’s went WELLL. Do u see why I hate my boyfriend? I hope no one else feels like this or is In the same situation or worse cuz my heart really just goes out for you I don’t know how tf il gunna cope for the rest of my life now I’m having a baby which is going to be even harder than it is now. I don’t know how long I’ve got till I break at this point I don’t think I will break I think I’m just going to be depressed for the rest of my life crying anytime we argue just wanting to leave nearly every day hating him more and more as the days go on all i want is someone who wantsto buy me flowers ( which he never has before and I’ve spoke about it cuz we’ve been together two n half years now) someone who will just hold me and I can feel the love coming from them the way they hold me tighter or maybe just even someone who cares about my feelings. I want to literally feel the love just with the way we look at each other not me looking at him disgusted just hating myself I don’t know what he’s gunna be like when I have this baby and that’s the scariest thing I know he won’t be horrible to the baby but still, I don’t want my son to be with girls and be like this it’s my worse nightmare. What would you do? I feel stuck I can’t leave him cuz I just can’t I know it’s silly I just can’t

Show your support

Leave him. It’s hard initially but you’ll be so glad you did in the future x

It sounds like he's being emotionally abusive towards you. Try and seek support from your family/friends if you can and if not, there will be external agencies in your area that can help with how to end the relationship. It doesn't sound like you're making an impulsive decision from what you've written, you've thought out how he makes you feel and don't want that for yourself. You also don't want him to be like that with you once the baby is here as it can be hard enough. I'd take some advice/support and go from there. Good luck x

Life is too short to be miserable! You have named so many reasons as to why you should leave. As you said, you don’t want to look back on your life and think ‘I spent my life with someone who doesn’t make me happy’ - you and your baby deserve more. If you have a support system, tell them how he behaves. They will support you in leaving and caring for your baby 🫶🏻

I promise you he will be like that to the baby and it’s not healthy for your child to grow up in that environment. I wouldn’t wait for baby to be born, I’d go get help now and say you’re scared that if you stay it’ll progress and once you have the baby it’ll be harder to access help. That feeling you have is your intuition, do not ignore it!

Thankyou so much !!

Leaving an abusive partner is one of the hardest things to do - be it emotional or physical. You are strong and you have to believe in yourself. As you say you think everything by the minute, you just have to make that rash decision and go - leave the pieces to fall together after, when there's a will there's always a way. At the end of the day, your child cannot choose their father but you can totally control who you let be their father figure and that doesn't necessarily have to be their biological dad. It sounds like your partner gets off on belittling and asserting his power / dominance so there's a chance that when the parenting role comes to him that could worsen and he could treat your little one horribly as that dominance role is naturally there and he could exaggerate it. But at the end of the day only you know what is right or wrong for you and your child. I'm only messaging based off a short paragraph on an app. Just know that you are strong and believe in yourself!

@Kaya thankyou so much girl x

You say he’s the worst person you know. You have no idea what he will be like with the baby. I have a feeling he’ll be even worse. Motherhood is hard even when you like your partner and they don’t treat you like crap. Now is the perfect time to leave while that baby is still inside you. Please try and reach out to family and friends and figure out a different living situation. It’s never too late to change your situation and living with this abuse doesn’t have to be your future.

Yes currently he is being a shitebag

@Hannah I agree I swear my baby’s dad has been worse since I’ve had the baby

I would leave. if you hate him now with how he treats you then you will hate him 10x more when the baby is here, at least if you do leave before then you’ll be able to enjoy motherhood without him bringing you down x

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌