Getting out the door

Hello I have adhd too

I find getting out the house before the first nap helps us. So wake up dress her quickly she plays for a bit on play matt whilst I shower and get ready mad fast then we get in the car and she naps on the way to groups

Also then feed her there when she’s up

@Charlotte I’ve tried to do this but she screams until she’s sick if I don’t feed her. We do get up fairly quick in the morning as if we don’t it can mean we don’t do anything all day 😕

I struggled with this massively! How old is baby? Don't sweat not being in a routine, mine didn't start to to find a routine until around 6 months and it was around then things started getting easier for us in terms of leaving the house/going to classes etc. You don't need a routine and you don't need to go to classes if that helps take the pressure off.

@Rebecca she’s 16 weeks! I just feel so guilty if I don’t do something with her haha. I’m not too worried about routine as I would probably not be able to stick to it anyway but just worry she’s suffering from my general inability to be a grown up 🤣

@Chloe she's not suffering at all! At that age she doesn't even know whether she's at a class or not, she's just happy being with you and taking in her surroundings wherever that might be! Try not to feel guilty, I know easier said than done. But honestly they are taking so much in and absorbing so much at that age that just playing with them at home is doing something with her!

Firstly I keep the pram and the car seat in the car so it's all ready to go. Nappy bag is always stocked up ready to go at a moment's notice- I restock it ready for next day in the evening usually. So "all" I need to do is get me and baby dressed which is still no easy feat!! I tend to shower/dress while she's asleep in the cot (or when she was younger put her in the bouncer while I shower and dress). Then when she wakes up I feed, change nappy and dress her then straight in the car. It's still very difficult to get anywhere for a set time because her naps aren't clockwork and the length of naps are very variable. But if I get out the house ASAP after a nap and feed it gives me the most time before she's tired/hungry again. However when she was younger and only slept in the car or on me I'd time outings in the car when she needed to sleep. So it depends what will work best for you.

And don't stress about the classes. Any sensory rooms you can book in your area? Less pressure to get there on time. Or soft play areas, garden centres, Xmas displays in shops, the park.... they'll be happy just going out and about with you tbh. And if it's too stressful and the anxiety is leaking over to baby then stay home. Order some sensory toys off vinted or amazon and spend time with LO at home ❤️

I've missed a few classes and things due to not being able to get out of the house on time ... I try and get myself ready when he goes down for his first nap but this can be at slightly different times and lengths depending on his night sleep so I get it. But honestly try not to stress about it. If I miss a class or something then I'll just take him out for a walk around the park or something or I book things that have a longer session - there's a soft play with baby sensory by me that offers a session between 9:30 and 1:30 so I know if we're a little later or he's napping then I can go at any time x

We never really had a set schedule. I fed him and put him to sleep on demand. He is 8 months old now. So don't beat yourself on that. It will get easier. What worked for me is as soon as he was up I got dressed, changed his diaper, got him ready, quick feed while reading (just so he wouldn't fall asleep again haha) and then off we went. 😅 So feed her just before you're ready to leave. She'll sleep in the car/stroller cause she'll have a full belly

@Chloe feed her then nappy then straight to the car even if it means going out in what she slept in then then redress them at group that’s what we have to do 😅 other mums probably wonder what I’m doing but for all they know we had a poop explosion

I also literally just dress myself I don’t bother doing my hair or make up I’ve accepted I’ll have to look like a scarecrow at this point if I want to go out 😅

I have 3 kids and have to do a school run for one of them, so I have had to master getting out of the house on time 😅. I'm normally up by 6 anyway, so I get baby dressed first thing when she wakes up as she needs changing anyway, then I put baby on the bed whilst I get dressed, or sit her in her jumperoo whilst my son entertains her downstairs! I don't do my hair or any make up, literally just get dressed and wash my face! Pram is always kept in the car for ease. She usually has a bottle before we're due to leave.

I started just adding on an hour to how long I think it will take to leave the house and generally this gets me places on time. Mine is 11m and still barely has a routine only her first nap is consistent the rest is up to fate.

Preparation is key! I have to be organised and have a routine to stay in control (BPD). If we have plans for the following day I will pack the bag with what I can the night before, I will have an outfit out for me and little man out plus my make up etc, nap time will then be in the car on the way to wherever we are going even if that means leaving slightly earlier! Don’t know if this will help you but it deffo does me x

Maybe not put so much pressure on yourself you are doing great momma. Also baby doesn’t care about classes or any of it right now that stuff is more for you. Which is of course ok because it’s like play groups for babies and way for momma to get out. Don’t overwhelm yourself allow yourself time to feed baby and get ready. Maybe get up earlier if this is an issue or just don’t go to the classes find something else to do with baby so you aren’t feeling like a bad mom when you aren’t. You are a great mom. This is the resting and getting to know baby more stage. Hugs momma you got this

Omg shes so small! Give yourself a break. You’ve only just had her! ADHD def doesn’t help, my hubbby has it and I often help him get out the house with ours. But it takes time. Routine will come. You say she naps whenever but she is probably following some kind of pattern already. Try somehow note it down when the naps and food are to try make sense of it. But really, don’t be so hard on yourself. There’s plenty of time for sensory classes and what not. Also when he was little about the age of yours, he would fall asleep in sensory classes and rhyme times 🤷‍♀️ doesn’t matter - just go with the flow. As others said. Prep the bag, yours and LOs clothes, pram etc. the night before. Then on the day feed and straight into the car! You’ll get there xx

I used to stress myself out the exact same it’s such a hard time ☹️ I usually left the house looking like Adam Sandler and if you see a fellow mum they just understand haha. I could barely ever put my clingy baby down but I found putting her in the bouncer with the dancing fruits on gave me some space to get dressed. Hang in there it gets easier I promise ❤️. But don’t feel guilty a walk round the block and the fresh air or going your local cafe for a coffee to keep you sane.

My advice would be, if you have plans for the next day- get your baby bag ready the night before, wash your hair the night before, sort out clothes for the next day, make sure all the bottles are clean etc just do as much as you can before bed and it will make the following day run so much smoother x

You’re not failing at all! My second baby does absolutely no groups and gets dragged along on my toddlers routine 😩 I only do drop in groups that run for a couple of hours then I can just rock up when I’ve managed to bundle my screaming chaos kids in the car (I promise you’re not the only one with babies that scream in the morning!!) 😂 maybe try that? They are normally at village halls and church halls etc! If not baby still gets a lot out of walks and simple things like looking at trees! Hang in there it gets so much easier as the months roll on 🙏🙏🙏 xxx

The lack of sleep doesn’t help the stress of it all either xx

I just wanted to say thank you all so much for your advice on this! We’ve had two much better days thanks to making sure everything is organised the night before. I’ve also decided to stop putting pressure on myself and if we can’t make it out to a group etc. it’s not the end of the world and we can just go for a walk or a little coffee together instead. ADHD is a pain in the arse, wish I could hyper fixate on being organised 😅🤣 x