Need to vent

I’ve been struggling so much lately, and I don’t even know where to start. For the past 3-4 months, I’ve been spotting almost every day, and the cramping makes it unbearable at times. I’m almost 2 years postpartum, haven’t breastfed in over a year, so I don’t understand why this is still happening. On top of that, things with my husband feel so heavy. Every outing turns into a fight, and we’re barely being intimate anymore. He gets angry so quickly, lets it out, and then he’s calm again—but I’m left feeling awful, holding onto it, and having panic attacks. He says I’m the one picking the arguments, that I’m too argumentative, but I don’t see it that way. I’ve also been struggling with my body. I’ve never been on the lighter side—size 16 before having my baby, size 20 after—and postpartum hasn’t been kind to me. I had a c-section, and my lower belly still has that “post c-section” look I can’t seem to shake. But I started keto this summer, and I’ve worked so hard that I’ve already lost so much weight and made it back to a size 16. The other day, I went to buy jeans, and I found a pair I loved. I was so excited to show my husband, but when I did, he just looked at me, almost disgusted, and said they were too tight because you could see the lower part of my stomach. That crushed me. I’ve come so far, but moments like that make me feel like nothing I do is good enough. I feel so alone, so misunderstood, and completely drained. It’s like I’m carrying too much at once, and I don’t know how to put it down. I just needed to get this out because holding it in feels impossible.

Show your support

I’m glad you let out how you’re feeling, keeping feelings in can be so draining and exhausting. It sounds like your pp experience hasn’t been a good one. I think maybe having a serious heart felt conversation with your husband would be a good idea to express all you’ve said here. I am sorry that your marriage hasn’t been great but I will make duas for you and your family. I do hope you seek support from family and friends and even a therapist. Feel free to reach out to me. Inshallah things will get better 🤲

Make a lot of dua sister I know it’s hard and many of us are going through similar situations it’s very hard wallahi

Your husband is so mean! I had to say it. Have a long hard conversation with him. Say you are going through so much mentally and physically and on top of that, instead of comforting and reassuring me, you’re breaking my heart. Whats the problem? Be honest with me? I hope he does explain why he makes nasty comments. Was he like that before baby??? Me and my husband argue a lot more after kids, because I feel like he’s too strict and I’m the complete opposite. So parenting can be hard and lots of parents clash. BUT he never makes me feel fat or ugly with his comments. I really think you need to have a long conversation with him!

I’m a size 12 and I hate my body too, thought I’d mention that, I always hide my body from him now. I can’t even lose it! My kids don’t let me work out. I have 2 little ones who cling on to me. So I’m so impressed you dropped that much weight!!! Amazing! He should be complimenting you. Also another thing I wanted to mention, it could be he’s going to postnatal depression too. I didn’t realise but my husband also went through it. He became an angry man, which is not like him at all. When the kids came easier to handle, he went back to work and now he’s normal again. So it could be that he’s depressed. That’s why you guys really need to talk.

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌